Poems & My Thoughts

Heartbreak 101

You know what’s worse than a break up? A heartbreak and wanting someone you can’t have. Either because they’re taken or they just don’t see any interest in you. A heartbreak? Ugh, let me tell you. It’s like you can invest ALL of your time in a person and give them EVERYTHING they want and ask for and then receive NOTHING in return. Or you two can be together for awhile and they just start acting differently and moving funny. There can only be two reasons for why that’s happening. Either they found someone new or the love and feelings aren’t there anymore. Then it’s like the only option that you have is to let go. That shit hurts. It makes you not want to eat, see outside, none of that. It changes you. It changes your perspective on a lot of things and a lot of people. It changes you into a completely different person. You become more careful and your guard is set up. Your heart no longer loves the same. It's like it takes a whole lot of action to change your mindset. When you’re broken and hurt, you start seeing everyone and everything differently. You think everyone is coming around to hurt you. When you’re broken,you listen to music, think about all the memories you two shared, you cry and you don’t want anyone else but that one person. 

           You want them back but you become torn. It’s either you tell them how you feel hoping things will work out or be hurt  and do your best to move on and let go. You know how long it takes to move on? Especially depending on how deep the feelings were. When you really love and care for someone, it's not that easy. You can’t just say “fuck them”. You can’t just expect your happiness to be right then and there or overnight. You have to get used to doing everything that you used to do without them. And trust me, it’s not that simple. You don’t want to meet new people. You don’t want to go anywhere .You don’t want to do anything that doesn’t involve them. Sometimes it takes weeks, months, probably even a year. Like I said, it depends on how strong the feelings were. Then you start thinking , its like so many questions run through your head and your mind starts to wonder. The questions sometimes are, “Was it real? Was I wasting my time? Does he/she still think about me? Are they broken and hurt just like me? Did he /she mean he/she said?”. The thought makes you cry even more. Everything you do reminds you of them.