About me but adhd brung it off topic, deeper into what i'm trying to go over

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by What_Ya_Want

by What_Ya_Want

let's call myself Eliana.. i'm Chinese but hella white washed, i literally had to use auto correct to spell Chinese for me ... as i auto correct it again haha. i'm 16.. but held back.. i got held back in first grade because my mom wanted me to learn some of my culture like learning the language is gonna help learn culture.. it does in a way but it's like teaching someone how to make a dutch bro's or a better known place, starbucks coffee, a coffee drink.. but everything is labeled so you don't know what is in each thing that makes up the coffee or what the coffee drink is called you just know what thing goes together to make this certain coffee you don't know the name of.

i was NOT raised chinese or in Asia.. my moms hella white. She grew up in Idaho and California once she got me..my moms whole family is white so we didn't know shit about the asian comunity.. though my mom is in the church so she served a year and a half in Taiwan.. so there is that.. but my chinese brother he is not my biological brother.. that is one main question people ask when family gets brought up..

and so, i'm adopted right? my mom didn't get married and got me when she was on the older side, she got another kid, a boy, let's call him Ben.. ben was adopted when he was a few years old like 3 to 4... when we first got him and quick fun fact he likes to blame every little thing on because he was adopted or because some psychological reason from the orphanage that he doesn't remember of.. which could be but it's not the reason why he's good at electronics or why his favorite color is blue and gray..

my family life is interesting.. my mom is a lawyer for herself she is self employed and my aunt is an actress who got kidnapped when she was a teen, my age.. she lost all her teen years so now is trying to be a teen adult kinda, or she has the teen personality with the living and having a job as an adult.. it doesn't get in the way and surprisingly she doesn't have ptsd, and if she did she sure got over it pretty fast.. she does well in her life she always is workiing..unlike me.. my lazy a

so my grandmas family is an open book one of my grandmas 10 brothers is a prison guard right? he ended up marrying this girl in prison for murder.. and then half of her siblings are hella mormon and the other side is drug addicts in jail or dead because of drugs.

my grandpas family on the other hand is a closed book with many trailers.. so over a course of time he will say like a line or two of the story and you have to piece them together after a while, he rarely ever tells a full story of what happened

ALSO we have a tendency of having random cousins we never knew about pop up.. we live for one night stands.. with UnpretEcted sex

i'm getting off topic but like i'm ranting here cause no one reads my shit and no one in my life listens i'm the therapist cause i'm good with drama and good with perspectives so yuh i dare you to try to start shit with me it will finish faster then your mom does when i fuck her- no im kidding lmao but yeah i'm good at not being in drama.. people like me.. i have a lot of friends but very little close friends and even them they are distant and funnier then me so they all bond when i'm not their and they all ignore me and vise why i'm here.. also because i've always wondered if my life would seem like a whattpad story if i narrated it .. kinda funny

i've taken like 14 years of dance and my mom only now is letting me quit.. jk i still have to do a jazz class or clogging class..

i've done 9 years of Chinese-ooh i realized i did know how to spell that but it marks wrong cause i didn't capitalize it hahaha

9 years of chinese with teachers who dont know how to teach and with my dory ass memory where i don't remember shit they point to shit and yell a chinese word till you get.. and then every teacher assumes each previous teacher taught us everything and we should all be very smart funnyyyy we aren't we stoopid as hell.

i've had an acne problem and my mom isn't getting me a therapist that i need for my many mental disorders i have

i'm moving to lets call it cake ville.. my mom and aunt bought a Bed and breakfast and is now running one so i'm switching schools.. i'm excited..

also i'm the third wheel and the other friend.. the girl who has never had a relationship but has the best advise

talking about that i wrote my friends breakup text.. she changed one thing that is how good i am bam bam.. and it was a long asss paragraph to..

it is almost one and i'm sitting here trying to take a shit and writing a book no one is gonna read and if you are god damnit i wish the best for you i'm not the most fucked up but where i feel i'm at right now this could turn into something it doesn't need to be.. and i feel like just sharing everything and seeing if im interesting for people to read about.. also sorry about the most likely depressing moods you'll get in i guess..

but its almost one am and i have work at eight am so that is fun.. damn i'm getting hella anxiety if someone i know will recognize me or people who know this is my account will realize this is me and my life i'm ranting about.. aslo about the safety hazards i really don't care.. i'm not sharing names and names of places just drama and how i'm not okay.. we love also the way i'm sayin it or well in my head i see it as emotionless and just a blank stare but me being done with everything yk? idk but im gonna try to keep parts under 1000 so i'm at 1077 or well it will be 1098 bye