shattered smile

3

At lunch, I realize Miles has no plans of leaving me alone when he plops beside me. "So what are you having today?" he asks, as if we are old best friends.
I unwrap my tuna sandwich. "Same old sandwich, same old grapes, same old Coke." I reply, offering him a grape, which surprises me. Ever since he's come, I've been social, voluntarily, and wanted to talk to him. With his smiley eyes and happy demeanor, he seems to good to be true.
And I need to accept that he probably is. What high school boy, who's good looking and smart, befriends the outcast? That only happens in movies, and my life is far from one.
"Well, since I'm a gourmet chef, I'm having PB&J, a culinary classic." Miles laughs, jolting me out of my thoughts.
"Nice," I tell him sarcastically. "What do you have next period?"
"Drama," he tells me, flashing his schedule.
"Oh, that'll be fun for you. That's where they put all the drama geeks and orchestra dorks. The teacher, Mrs. Simons, is nice though." I say through a mouthful of grapes.
"Okay, let me ask you something. Why do you wear the hoodie and sit alone? You're really nice, and I'm sure you would be accepted if you tried. So why?" Miles asks seriously.
I feel my cheeks grow warm, and the familiar feeling in the pit of my stomach. "Seeing as I've known you for about five hours, I'm not ready to divulge that information yet." I tell him, trying to make it seem like I'm joking, but feeling agitated.
"It's okay," Miles smiles, "I'm patient."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Once I get off the bus, I unlock the front door and toss my bag down, seeing my dog, Snickers, run over. "Hey sweet girl," I say, rubbing her belly. My house looks the same as always- same old oriental rug, same old wooden floors, same old couch, covered where Snickers chewed through it. Same old games left out my by 12 year old sister, May.
Same old secrets and memories.
Same old blades in my room, pills stockpiled under the floorboard. Same old sheets stained with salt from nights of sobbing myself to sleep.
Same old walls that I stared at while thinking of death.
May walks in, startling me. "Hey," I say.
"Hi!" May grins, always happy. "I'm going to the mall with Regina and her mom, but I'll be back soon."
How she manages to stay happy baffles me.
I send her off, and have the whole house to myself. I make some popcorn and start on my homework when my phone buzzes.
It's Miles.
<ugh, moving sucks. hope your having more fun then me!>
I text back, smiling a rare smile.
<want to come over?>
The typed words surprise me. I haven't had anyone over since seventh grade, and now I'm inviting a virtual stranger home?
Way to go, Reese. This is how girls get raped.
But I push the thoughts aside and shake my hair out, awaiting the doorbell.
And then I hear it, and what I see on the other side of the door surprises me more than anything.