WRONG NUMBER | NIKI

28 - I'm Glad You Came

HANA'S POV

The club meets twice a week during break, usually in one of the older buildings on campus where the classrooms have been converted into cramped little workspaces filled with posters, half-finished projects, boxes of supplies, and far too many people talking at once. I had joined because I wanted something that belonged entirely to me, something that had nothing to do with my family, my grades, Aera, or the strange mess my life had become over the past few weeks. 

I hadn't expected Jungwon and Niki to be here too, although by now neither of their presences surprises me. I knew they were members before I walked through the door that first afternoon, and I had already prepared myself for the uncomfortable reality of existing in the same room as both of them. What I hadn't prepared myself for was how different it would feel to look at them now. 

Jungwon is no longer simply Jungwon, the boy I used to think I understood until I discovered how much of our beginning had been built on a lie. He is the boy who lied to me, yes, but also the boy who told me the truth when he could have continued lying, the boy whose guilt I had seen written all over his face when I confronted him. 

And Niki is somehow worse in a completely different way, because now every memory of him has been rearranged too. Every warning I dismissed. Every strange look. Every time he seemed irritated whenever Jungwon came near me. Every moment when he tried to tell me there was something I wasn't seeing. I had thought he was judging me. I had thought he was trying to make himself look better by making Jungwon look worse. Now I know he was simply telling me the truth, and there is something deeply uncomfortable about realizing that the person you distrusted most may have been the person who was trying hardest to protect you.

Today, I keep myself busy. It is easier that way. There are stacks of papers spread across one of the tables, boxes of materials on the floor, and a half-finished display board leaning against the wall while everyone argues over where it should go. I spend almost an hour cutting pieces of cardboard and helping organize the supplies, deliberately keeping my attention anywhere except the two boys who are somewhere on opposite sides of the room. 

Every once in a while, I feel Jungwon's eyes on me, but I don't look back. Not because I hate him. I don't think I do anymore. I just don't know what I am supposed to do with him. Forgiving him and trusting him are two completely different things, and I am not ready to give him either. 

Niki is easier to be around when I don't think too much about him, but even that has become complicated. I want to apologize to him. I have wanted to for days now, but every time I get close, the words become too embarrassing to say. You were right. It sounds so small compared to everything that happened, and yet I know it is something I owe him. Maybe I am afraid that if I say it out loud, I will have to admit just how badly I misjudged him.

"Has anyone seen Niki?" Someone suddenly asks from across the room.

I look up automatically. "No."

"He was supposed to pick something up for us." The girl holding a clipboard looks around the room before sighing. "He left about twenty minutes ago. We're running out of time, and his phone isn't answering."

I glance instinctively toward the empty chair where Niki had been sitting earlier. His jacket is gone. His bag is gone too.

"Can you go look for him?" She asks me. "He shouldn't be far. He was just going to the store around the corner."

For a second, I hesitate because the thought of finding him alone somewhere suddenly makes my stomach twist with a nervousness I can't explain. Maybe because I have been thinking about him too much lately. Maybe because I have been telling myself for days that I need to talk to him, and now I have been handed an excuse to do exactly that.