Watching Someone Move On

Chapter 1: How long?

     Just how long has it been? Over time they seem to have become less sad, more accepting of everything that's happened. I'm glad they're feeling better but somehow it feels wrong. As of recent, they smile so much more at their phone while texting someone, they leave much more often as well. I've tried to follow them but I can't seem to leave the front of the apartment complex but, I can go to the playground that's right near the complex. I wait for them every day whether it's them coming from work or whatever activities they go out to do.

     Today they came home later than usual, a bit drunk at that. following them into what used to be our bedroom I watched as they flopped onto the bed hearing the start of their choked sobs. I walked over laying on my side beside them looking at their beautiful hair. "come back...just come back.." Those were the only words I heard come from them before loud sobs rung through the room. Oh, how I wish I could hug them, tell them it's all okay no matter if I'm there or not. I know they're strong both physically and mentally but truth be told I don't really know how to help you. "My love, please pick yourself back up. You can keep going just as how I've seen you do in the past". I placed my hand upon their cheek when they turned over rubbing their skin. 

     Time keeps moving no matter what happens to us, that's the way the world works. If I could stop time till they felt better I surely would without any questions. I watch as they fall asleep before I get up and walk out of the apartment seeing many other people though some seem just like me. A lost soul watching those they loved before the world crashed in on them. None of us interact very much but we do like to hang around each other occasionally though none of us usually talk. The most tragic part of it all is children being stuck like this I can only imagine how distressing it is. I've taken it upon myself to comfort some of them when they're all alone. currently, though I've decided to walk to the roof of the complex. "No matter how many times I've seen the sky from here I truly can never get tired of it," I spoke softly to myself as I gazed up at the sky many stars twinkling in the black abyss but the moon shone brightly casting a white hew over the area. Looking over the area I saw so many places I used to visit regularly.  

     Now that I think about my life I accept that in all actuality I got what I've always wanted but truly just not at the right time. I used to ask for death to come and take me but It never did when I wanted it to. Just when days seemed to get better It was stolen, ripped straight from my hands on that day. It's kind of ironic truthfully... I miss the good days I used to have with them, all the fun times and all the sad times. Each moment meant so much to me, their words of all these promises ring in my head even ones I thought I had long forgotten from years ago. "I want to go back and take back all the harsh words I've ever said to you. Such stupid words when I only had so much time with you. What did I say to you that day? WAs it good? Bad? I only remember a miserable feeling from that day...I hope my last words to you were kind." I sat on the railing of the roof feeling small tears fall onto my cheeks as my vision blurred. I suppose those old bastards were right when saying to live every day as if it's your last.

     Then again, what's the point of living as if it's the last day of your life if you can't even remember the last day? I guess if you remember a strong feeling from it you'd want it to be happy over anything else am I right? But I don't know...what's the point if you can't even remember why you felt happy? Though I know these aren't questions I'll ever get answers too It's interesting to think about in a way I suppose. "I should head back." I got up and headed back down going back to the apartment that I've been stuck to for who knows how long. As I entered I sat on the island of our kitchen and that's where I stayed for the remainder of the night, not like there was anything else I could do.

      The next day came and once again, they left the apartment to go to work. It amazes me they can stay so strong like this still. I'm unsure if it's because they don't care or if they're just trying to distract their self from how they feel. I followed them to the front of the apartment watching as they drove off to the main road. "Death really is a lonely thing." I heard as I turned my head seeing an older gentleman who was just like me. "Yeah.. Yeah it is." I said as I walked away a bit shaken since no other ghost had ever initiated a conversation with me besides children. I walked with light strides, weight not being something that can hold me down anymore as I walk, run, or jump. When entering the apartment I realized just how desolate of happiness it felt, the air seemed heavy and as if a heavy fog plagued it even though that's just my imagination. As I looked around just as I always do I noticed some photos were gone replaced by new ones of them and someone I don't recognize. When did this happen? I don't understand!

Just how long has it been?