Till Death Do Us Part

Chapter 1- The Meeting

April

It's mums one year death anniversary today. I didn't show up at school, I asked dad if I could and he gave me that look, as if I was a hurt puppy asking for help, then hugged me and told me that he "knows it's hard" and I "just need time to adjust". If there's one thing I can't stand, it's other peoples pity. He should understand, she was his wife for God's sake. But no, he moved on quickly, as if it hadn't affected him at all. I know that's supposed to be a part of life, moving on, but why should we have to. I get that we can' always dwell on the past but it doesn't mean we should forget someone completely and act as if it never happened. As soon as dad left for work, I pulled on some boots,  and left for the woods. I go there often, it's my place to think and relax; where I can just be myself and not who everyone wants me to be. It's only a 6 minute walk from my house, so I put my earphones in, blasting Kodaline into my ears. Once I get there I let my brain navigate myself to my tree and to sit on my usual branch, my back resting against the trunk. I allow my eyes to close as I think to myself, not out loud like they do in movies, speaking their thoughts to the world. I've always felt like thoughts were the only things we can keep to ourselves, and that they're inside our heads for a reason. I'm always told I overthink, but I never care, I like the thought of my own little voice inside my head telling me what to do. As I rest against the trunk, I think about mum. I bring back all the good memories, the times she's bandaged my bruises, tied my hair when I couldn't myself, seeing me off on my first day of school. I think of all the times she's embarrassed me in front of my friends, but instead of cringing like I would Before, I embrace the memories, all of them. I miss gossiping with her, talking o each other about our day's and generally spending time with her. The first tear falls and I let it, I know mum would want me to be brave, she always did, but sometimes there's nothing wrong with showing emotion. She taught me that. I think about how easy it would be to jump from this high branch and just end all this suffering.
I realise that the album has finished as I hear someone call my name.
"Hey, April right? Are you okay?"
I look down towards the owner of the voice and she a boy my age, with light brown hair scattered across his forehead and ocean blue eyes that sparkle in the sunlight. like rippling waves. His skin is pale, but in a way that only he and vampires could ever pull off.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I reply as I climb down the tree. As I jump of the lowest branch I stumble slightly, and he catches me with small but strong arms. I mumble a quick thanks and stand up straight.
"You know fine doesn't usually mean fine, but if you don't wanna talk I'll let it slide," he smiles this genuine smile that lights up his face, and I can't help but offer a small smile in return. "I'm Sam by the way, we're in the same form but I doubt you've noticed me." he grins sheepishly and I remember something, he's the guy with severe anemia. I decide to try and make an effort, he does seem nice anyway.
"Sam, is that short for anything?" I ask.
"Yeah, Samantha," he replies seriously. Sam laughs as my eyes widen in shock and confusion. "Nah, when I was born my parents wanted a girl who they were gonna call Samantha. But instead they got me and went for Sam instead." he clarifies, grinning again. I envy him for being able to smile so easily, as if there's absolutely nothing wrong with the world we live in. Sam slings an arm around my shoulder as if we're already best friends, and starts walking off into a direction I've never been before.
"Um, where as we going?" I question, slightly nervous about wandering off with a stranger.
"Relax, I'm not a murderer, you can trust me. I'm taking you to my happy place, to cheer you up." he says in a calming tone. I feel myself relax into him, my head resting on his chest as he's a head taller than me. As we're walking he takes an earphone from my ear and puts it in his.
"What are we listening to? I don't hear anything," he asks.
"Oh right, I forgot to change it one second," I reply pulling out my phone from my pocket. I put on this modern glitch album by the wombats and begin to hum along.
"Who knew you had great taste in music!" Sam exclaims laughing, and, for the first time in a long time, I join in too. Soon we're both singing along to Tokyo - Vampires & Wolves so loudly and out of tune without a care in the world.
"If you love me let me go
Back to that bar in Tokyo
Where the demons from past
Leave me in peace
I'll be animating every night
The grass will be greener on the other side
And the vampires and wolves
won't sink their teeth...
I'm sick of dancing with the BEAST" We below the last line and fall onto the grass laughing, having reached our destination. Once I've calmed down I sit up and quietly observe our surroundings. We're in a small clearing on a hill hidden mostly by trees, with a gentle stream flowing down the centre. I can see why it's his happy place, it has a certain calm in the air, and there's also something secretive about it. As if whatever you say here remains here, secrets are kept, memories stay, happiness is eternal. I wonder how he found it but also don't care, I'm mostly happy that he brought me here because I really like it.
"It's beautiful," I murmur and allow myself a small smile.
"It's even more beautiful when you have someone to share it with," Sam says smiling. He walks over to the stream, pulling off his shoes and socks on the way. After rolling up his jeans he dips his feet into the water and gestures for me to join him. I do so, sitting next to Sam but leaving 6 inches between us, and dip my feet in after removing my shoes. The water is cool on my bare feet and fills me with a sense of serenity. We sit in comfortable silence for a while until Sam breaks the quiet.
"So, April, now that I have shown you my secret happy place and seem to have gained your trust, tell me your life story. Everything, spare no detail unless you really wish, for I am a good listener,"
For some reason, I believe and trust him, so I do.
I tell him about my childhood, my best and saddest memories, times with friends and family, birthdays and Christmas' right up until last year, where I hesitate. But then he nods like he understands that it's hard to open up, and I think he does understand so talk about what happened for the first time to anyone but my dad.
"As I was about to leave for school one day, my mum told me that she had a doctors appointment and that she would be home late. I nodded and asked if she was okay, to which she replied she was fine and I thought nothing much of it. But when she got home later that evening while I was in my room, she and my dad called me downstairs into the living room. They sat me down all serious which immediately told me something was wrong. And they told me that mum was diagnosed with lung cancer; she was a smoker but only had a cigarette once or twice every day. I didn't handle the news well, especially when they told me mum was going to have to go through a lot to help, but it was inevitable, she had 6 months. She went to chemotherapy and had all these kind of treatments but they only gave her an extra month. She died on this day last year, October 16th. I had, still have, trouble dealing with her death. But everyone else finds it so easy to move on, acting as if she's in a better place. But what better place than with her family? I don't understand the idea of life after death, I think it's humanity's way of clinging to existence, refusing to ever really be gone. But I like the idea of Gone, because there's no suffering if you aren't really there. I sometimes think it would be easier if I was just Gone." We lapse into silence again and I'm glad because I needed time to let what I just said sink in, I think he knows this too. I've never told anyone that I want to not be anymore, but it feels good to get it off of my chest. I don't regret saying it because it is how I feel, I just hope he never tells anyone.
After a while, he speaks up, putting an arm around my shoulder, "that's quite the life story."
That's all, no "I'm sorry for your loss" or "that must've been terrible". And I'm grateful he didn't say that because no one ever really means it, but it's like he understands that its hard. For the first time I've found someone who really understands, all throughout the space of a day. A day, God, is that the time?
"I have to go," I say, abruptly standing up. I start to walk away, but turn around quickly and give him a genuine smile, "to be continued..."
I walk the usual route home and manage to make it home before dad. I spent the rest of the evening in my room, only moving when my dad calls for dinner, listening to that same album from today.
Where the demons from my past leave me in peace...

Sam

"To be continued..."
Her last words have been buzzing in my ears all the way home. I can't stop thinking about them throughout dinner, which my family always spend in front of the tv, watching family fortune or other reality shows I have no interest in. I notice that Sherlock's on but I don't bother asking if they want to want it, I know the answer and they ignore me anyway. So I sit in quiet bliss, surrounded only by my thoughts of "To be continued...".
 After dinner I retire to my room where I decide to read Sherlock to make up for not watching it. Many people find it hard to get through the Sherlock books, they are wordy and complicated, but that is exactly the reason I love them. Nowadays we don't use enough long or complicated words. In fact, everything is dumbed down; because becomes bc; never mind becomes nvm and so on and so forth. After I finish a study in scarlet I use my now extended Sherlock knowledge to deduce April. From what I see around school, and that everyone knows, she's popular. Has her own table with a ground of friends in the canteen, always saying hello to people around school. And since her mum passed away she's got even more people being nice to her if they weren't already. I can tell that she doesn't enjoy the pity parade though, from the way she spoke and the fact that she came to the woods alone. She also seems like a very closed person, mainly keeping her thoughts to herself. I can respect that, I know people don't always understand what goes on in another person's head. She cares about her appearance but not much outside of school, that I can tell by the way she tied up her dark wavy locks, and wore boots instead of the trademark popular vans or converses. She was depressed, any idiot could see that, but apparently people at school can't see through the fake smiles and the "I'm fine"s where I can. But that's okay, I'm making it my mission to help her in anyway I can. A lesson on living from a boy who's nearly dying. I get up from my bed and walk over to my wall of words. This is just a blank wall that I stick words I like from magazines, or write down words and quotes from books or movies or shows. I write down the final lines of a study in scarlet and stick it to a blank space on the wall. Populus me sibilat, at mihi plaudo Ipse domi stimul ac nummos contemplar in arca. I go onto my laptop and search up the meaning; The public hiss at me, but I cheer myself when in my own house I contemplate the coins in my strong-box. It's a strange sentence, but I like the way the Latin rolls off the tounge. I say it aloud five times, allowing the words to sink in. I get another peace of paper and write  "To be continued..." . I like that too, the thought of something eternal, immortal even, never dying. I'd like that, to be completely and forever existent, to have all the time in the world to visit every corner of it. I change into my pyjamas and crawl into bed, getting comfortable beneath the warm covers. I think of how long we will be continuing as I slowly drift off into sleep.