Who Am I Really? (KuroKen)

Chapter 5

⚠️WARNING: Does involve talk about self-harm!⚠️

Kenma's POV:

  One day, my mom and dad were on a work trip. I was walking home from school that day and knew they wouldn't be home until the next evening. I went to a convenient store to get some American chips Nishinoya had told me about last time we met, but unfortunately they didn't have them because well, this is Japan so, I just left and kept walking home.

  When I finally got home, there were three, sleek, black cars in the driveway. I knew they didn't belong to my family. I opened the door and almost got shot in the head with a bullet. I stood in the doorway horrified. Some other mafia gang had broken in our house and were aiming at my family's mafia and the enemy had my mother hostage. My parents had come home early.

  The enemy's leader said she was going to shoot my mother if my father wouldn't give up everything we had. She obviously didn't do her homework about my father because my father isn't afraid of anything and my dad shot my mom in cold blood. I thought my father had loved her, but..I was wrong. He had no regards for human life whether they were family or not.

  I could've stopped him. He was right there...right in front of me across from the other leader, while she was pointing a gun at my mother's head, holding my mother hostage. I didn't say a word, but before she died, she noticed me standing in the doorway, watching the whole thing.

  "Kozume...I-I love-" BANG!
  My father shot her and didn't hesitate, no second thought. I stared at her lifeless body and couldn't say a word, shed a tear, not even blink...That move itiated the blood-shed in our house. Gunshots could be heard throughout the whole neighborhood. And I stood there, still staring at my mother's corpse, throughout the whole thing.

  After the whole fiasco, my father's men were carrying the bodies outside and into a truck. I asked my dad why he did what he did and he answered,

   "She was slowing me down. She was just there to be your mother figure. Now that she's gone, you won't be slowed down either. You're free, Kozume."

  He talked about her like she wasn't my mother. As if I was heartless. I resented that man for what he did, but it's been four years since then and he hasn't changed a bit. I asked him if he had to do it again, would he?... "Yes, I would." That son of a bitch shot and killed the woman that was supposed to be his wife and partner and my mother.

  That's the day I stopped believing in love. Love isn't real. It's just an illusion for entertainment.

  He took my mother away from me and I couldn't forgive him then, and I can't now.  I will always hate that man, but I can't disrespect him. He's a powerful man and won't hesitate to do anything, not for a second.

  I still hear her cries from that day...her voice is still heard in my head. "Kozume, my son...'I love you' is what I wanted to say. Please, join me. I'm happy here- -We can be happy here..together. You'll make me sad if you don't come soon. Remember, you're lunch is on the counter." She was a happy woman and never cared to think about the world, which is very dangerous when you're in the mafia.

   A few days later, I heard her talking again, but something was off. It sounded like her enchanting voice, but she asked me to do things. She was different. Sometimes, she told me little pieces of me could join her, so she wouldn't be so alone. She told me to cut myself, so little pieces of me could float up to her and I'd be around with her. Twice, I've already tried to commit suicide and obviously it failed. But..I still cut myself. The old cuts from four years ago are there, but they're faded.

  No one knows, not even Shoyo. It's not like he'll help...no one can help me.

  Hey, guys. Um, so in case someone cried or something, I have tissues. Ngl, I cried writing this. This chapter goes with chapter 4 so, yeah. Thank you for continuing to read this book. I really hope you've enjoyed this chapter. (1519 words in total of both chapters.)