Rome & Julie

Chapter 29

“Don’t worry… about a thing… cause every little thing’s gonna be alright,” I sung softly, ignoring the chattering of my teeth and watching my breath fill the cold night air before me.  “R-rise up this morning… smiled with the rising sun…” My voice died off as I couldn’t bring myself to hold the tune any longer.  A sob sat precariously at the edge of my throat, cutting off my uneven breath and my sad attempt at a song to brighten my mood.

I wasn’t sure where I was.  Some bench by a bus stop, maybe.  The path I’d taken to get there was a blurry one.  And I wasn’t sure how long I’d been there, but it was long enough for me to watch the sun go down and the moon take its place.  There was a lone streetlamp nearby that allowed me to see enough to where I wasn’t afraid someone would attack me.  But then again, I was close to the richest neighborhood in the state:  who was going to bother me?  Either way, there was a good possibility that the low but ever-present ache in my heart caused me to just not care.

I loved Rome.

A pang of something shot through me painfully, and I winced at the unpleasant sensation.  My already-wet eyes grew prickly, and I quickly rubbed at them, completely not in the mood to cry anymore.  I shuddered; from what, I wasn’t sure.  The cold, the situation.  Everything.

What was I doing, letting myself fall in love?  If Rome and I hadn’t fallen in love, the business wouldn’t have regressed, and his mother wouldn’t have sent people to beat him up.  Just like I predicted, love caused only tragic events.  While I was in love with him, only harm would come to Rome.

Inevitable tears filled my eyes as I realized in a way, it was my fault that Rome was beat up, and that he was going through so much hell with his mother.  I’d distracted him.  Fallen in love with him.  Been so caught up with him, that I wasn’t even aware of the side effects…

I was being selfish.

Staying with him, feeding my own personal desires, ruining what was left of the relationship between Rome and his mother, destroying the business in my selfish wake, wreaking havoc around every bend and every stretch in the road.

­But you make each other happy…

The voice in my head was soft, yet I heard its words, all the way to my cold, aching hurt.  Was the happiness that came with being together enough to overpower the distress that always followed close behind?  The word ‘no’ came to mind, and I felt my chin sag to my chest, defeated.

To protect ourselves, I knew what had to be done.

Despite the voice in my head telling me otherwise, I decided what was best.

I had to leave Rome, and never go back.

A rebellious tear leaked through the barrier of my squeezed eyes, and the feeling of it, running down my cheek, the cold air stinging the path it left behind, caused a sob to break through my aching chest.  I attempted to heave a breath in recovery, but it only resulted in more sobs and broken breathing.  Sitting there, the icy wind freezing whatever warmth was left within me, the coughs and sobs racking my body almost drowned out the sound of an approaching vehicle.

Almost.

I managed to quiet down as I looked up through my wet eyelashes, into the incoming headlights of a large, white SUV.  I swallowed roughly, my throat aching in protest at the intrusion.  I ignored the throb, but I couldn’t ignore the quickening of my heartbeat at the sinking feeling in my gut.

I couldn’t understand why or how, but I knew my instinct was telling me to run, get out of sight, or escape far away.  My chin quivered in fear, and I stumbled up, off of the bench, and I turned to run.  Just as I tore away, the headlights hit my form, and I knew with a sinking, gut-wrenching feeling that only further tormented my plagued heart, that whoever was in the van had seen me.