A Room With a View

All Alone in the Moonlight

August 16, 2005 - A Hallway in Hogwarts

Severus sat on the ground with his head in his hands as he took stock of his bruises. How could I have forgotten something so important? I remember the three of them visiting once while I was recovering, but after that...nothing. Just pain and recuperation and therapy and...then the decision to travel and track down the Dark Lord's followers. Why did I have to travel? I...I can't remember.

He scrubbed his hands over his face and rose off the floor, flicking his wand at the pile of metal to restore the armor to its previously vertical state. He considered returning to his apartments, but didn't know what he'd do with himself there. That left one solution: Minerva. He began to walk toward the Headmistress' quarters.

Minerva answered his knock almost immediately. "Severus! What can I help you with?"

"I have a problem. Can we talk?"

"Of course. Come in, dear. What's wrong? Was something not delivered to your classrooms?"

Severus chuckled mirthlessly. "If only. I'm afraid my problem is of a more personal nature. I could use a friend with a sharp mind to help me sort it out."

"What's wrong?" asked the concerned witch, gesturing her friend toward an armchair.

He sank into it gratefully and rubbed at his shoulder. "I have made a serious misstep with Professor Granger and I am at a loss as to how to fix it."

Minerva nodded with understanding. "Ah. I had wondered. You're not the first professor here to have to work with a former flame. After all the time you spent together during your recovery, I had rather assumed that you must have had a--"

"That's just it! I have no memory of spending time with her during my recovery!"

Minerva stared at Severus for several moments. "You--none? But you were inseparable for months! I don't understand."

"Neither do I, Minerva! I...I'm sorry, I shouldn't have, but I used legilimency on her when she was shouting at me in the hall this evening. I saw the friendship we formed, but it was as though I was watching an actor playing me on the telly. I don't remember any of it. I only remember her visiting me with Potter and Weasley after I emerged from my coma."

She blinked at his disregard for Hermione's mental privacy, but decided to shelve that concern for the more immediate one. "Severus, this worries me. You spent nearly every day with Hermione and occasionally Harry during your recuperation and rehabilitation. You had, I believe, formed a tendre for her. I know that she formed one for you. She's like a daughter to me, so it was me she came to when you suddenly left for the continent. She was devastated."

Severus scrubbed at his face and stared hard at his colleague. "Minerva, I need your help. I need to remember what happened and I need to find out why I have approximately 9 months of false memories."

She studied him for a moment before suggesting, "My dear, it sounds as though you've been Obliviated. I know you recognize the signs, though I'm surprised someone managed to 'get the jump on you,' as it were. I can tell you a bit of what I know of that time, but it would probably be best if you spoke to Professor Granger yourself, and soon. I'd also like to write Kingsley about this. We can have an expert from St. Mungo's visit here at the castle and attempt to reverse the obliviation. But you know the success rate on such attempts, of course. I'll venture Hermione is aware as well," she said, thinking of Hermione's somewhat distant parents. Five years later, she knew they were still receiving therapy for the obliviation that had likely saved their lives.

"That sounds like a reasonable course of action. Would you--would you mind asking Hermione to join us here this evening? I'm not entirely sure she'll speak to me one-on-one." He rubbed his shoulder again ruefully. The little witch had given him a surprisingly strong shove.