Thread Apart

Three

I thought about the Lord far longer than I should have. Why did he leave? Did my glass of wine really upset him that much? Did my.. unpredictability?

Once again, the man I was to be threaded held more mystery than I gave him credit for. I always thought I had him all figured out, and time and time I was proven wrong.

I could not speak frankly with the Lord about his thoughts, but perhaps the staff knew something I did not.

"Handmaiden?" I was not even allowed to know the names of those that served me. Another facet of this new life I truly detested.

"Yes, miss?" She piped up, always so eager to assist me.

"Have you... heard anything," I started, "About why the Lord ended our session early today?"

The handmaiden's features softened. She was a bit older than me, but I could tell she would be beautiful if given the same amount of care that she gave me. "Oh, miss. Please do not fret. The Lord has his father on his mind. We are approaching the anniversary of his passing."

The previous man of the house, Lord Branley, was a man I had only come to know through word of mouth. He was also either locked away in his office or out traveling on official business whenever I had a monthly session with Willem. The late Lord had been known to be intimidating. My mother mentioned seeing him once and said it was like he sucked all of the air out of the room. Five years ago, he had passed on. No official statement had ever been released as to the cause. At the time of his passing, his son declined sessions for six months. I cursed myself for the ugly thoughts I had at the time, thankful for the Lord's passing so that I did not have to see his son.

I do not remember Lord Willem acting this way around this time of year previously. Perhaps there was something else that the handmaiden did not want me to know.

I placed a hand over my heart, and a sympathetic look on my face. Always an act in this house, even in the privacy of my room. "May the Lord join the Ones Above." It felt weird to say.

"May he join," the handmaiden closed her eyes and bowed her head for a moment. Did she actually wish the late Lord a peaceful passing?

I thought it best to mention, "I would rather the young Lord not know I was asking about him."

"Of course, miss." I never knew if I could fully trust her, but the Lord never brought up the handmaiden's and I'd conversations.

The shadows in the room started to rise. "I believe I can manage for the rest of the evening."

"Yes, miss." The handmaiden bowed and took her leave, allowing me to have my first private moment of the day.

I spent the remainder of the evening in the bath, enjoying being free of the tight gown and enjoying the solitude. While I often felt lonely here, amongst the Lord and many servants, there was hardly a time where I could just be alone. I often extended my nights until my eyes stung, dreading the morning sun.

If I looked exhausted, my handmaiden never made comment. Some days, especially on session days, she'd take extra care of my face. Smearing a nude color cream under my eyes.

-

We were invited to a ball. My handmaiden had been so excited for me while delivering the news this morning. Handmaidens and Stewards were permitted to attend at the discretion of their mistress or master, lady or lord. And I could tell she really wished to attend. This would perhaps be the most exciting thing to happen to her all year. But I did not know her life outside of being my handmaiden, so perhaps that was an ignorant assumption to make.

"I will, of course, have to discuss with Lord Willem regarding our attendance," I told her. Truth be told, I was not sure the Lord's stance on these types of activities. It would be nice if she was there with me though.

This will be my first official ball. It was being hosted by a more esteemed Lord and lady an hour's ride away. The invitation mentioned that this ball was being held in order to honor the Matches. Those who have not yet gone through their threading. So the Lord and I would be fools not to attend.

The ball was to be held in a month's time. "I will have the seamstress begin work right away!" My handmaiden left the room for a few minutes to speak with a fellow staff member outside. That's right, an extravagant gown would be required. I felt a little giddy in anticipation. Even if I did have to attend at the Lord's side.

I longed for my mother. She had been to a few balls in her time, and regaled me with all kinds of stories. I know she would be gushing with me over news of my first.

There was one story of hers I never forget. I'd repeatedly asked her to tell me over the years. The time she had snuck into a Fae Court ball. My mother had been reckless and wild in her youth, and traveled much of the lands before settling down and having me.

The Fae Court in the south was celebrating their winter solstice. My mother had been in the court, searching for an old friend who had asked to meet her there, when she heard of the ball. While it had been an open invitation to all, my mother felt it best to disguise her appearance anyway. The Fae love their costumes after all.

Donning a rabbit-esque mask, she entered the ball and took in the spectacle before her. She described all the different types of Fae and creatures there. How they all danced and danced without a care in the world. How magic filled the air, sparkling in her eyes.

While my mother was in complete awe of the Court whenever she spoke of her time there, she always remembered to mention how malicious the Fae could be to our kind.

Every one grew up here learning the rules for dealing with the Fae. It was ingrained in us, and yet, victims fell to their charms all the while.

They were simple rules, too. Do not eat or drink anything a Fae offers you. Do not dance with a Fae if they ask you. Do not accept a wish that a Fae gifts you.

I loved hearing the story from my mother, but I could not help the faint fear in my heart whenever she told it. Perhaps if I ever met one of the Fae, my fears would be dissuaded. Perhaps the Fae were not nearly as terrifying as my relationship with the Lord.