The One He Let Go

Dean

        When Jimmy told me about his mom, I thought, Wow, I'm a jerk. How could I do that to Jimmy? Now that I'm older and I think back on it, Wow, I was an asshole. How could I've done that to Jimmy!

        He was this little kid people liked to pick on. I never knew why, but the second I saw it, I didn't like it. I didn't know how long it was going on for before I showed up and stopped it, but there he was, just taking crap from these kids every day, then going home to a whole 'nother set of problems with his mom and having to take care of her. And there I was, just letting him think that he was being used instead of actually being a friend to me, but how the hell was I supposed to know that's what he was thinking? I thought we were friends! I remember, of all the things I should've done, I got pissed and I started yelling at him after he told me what he thought, which made me even more of an asshole, but surprisingly, Jimmy yelled back. I'm pretty proud of him for that. Not at the time, maybe, but now I am. At the time though, it only pissed me off even more. We were yelling and each other and arguing like babies. I dunno who realized it first, but we eventually both saw that it was pointless and stupid. I said I was sorry and hardly had time to finish my sentence before he accepted it right away and said he was sorry too. Then we were fine. Kids.. A simple "sorry" really did fix any fight there was back then, but you know, I think there was a little more to it. I honestly did think of Jimmy as kind of a little brother back then and knowing what the other kids would say to him, then finding out why just made me think, Hey, this kid really needs someone to look out for him. He really needed a friend. Now I wasn't just gonna be friends with him out of guilt or just cause I felt bad for him or I thought he needed protection; Jimmy was actually a cool kid. I thought that even before I knew his problems at home, and well, after I realized that he ain't just some kid to boss around until he hopefully went away. He knew how to race me around the neighborhood on our bikes, he knew how to shoot BB guns at tin cans, he knew how to throw a football. Me, on the other hand... Might've needed a little work. But Jimmy was a good kid. Always doing good things. He didn't deserve all the bullshit the other kids put him through. Of course, I didn't tell him any of that. I remember the exact words I said to him that day. After he said he was sorry to me, I told him, "It's all right, Jimmy. We're square."