Destine to be His (Eren Jaeger x reader)

Waking Nightmares

"Besides, we are out of options."

"It is good to see you... alive." The commander mutters against their laced knuckles.

The darkened chamber is pin drop silent as water drips slowly somewhere in the caves of the catacombs, echoing through the stillness. 

You swallow softly, eyeing the commander of the survey corps silently from where you sat, Armin standing at your side, but somehow his presence felt the opposite of supportive. 

The last time you'd seen Commander Hange had been the day you'd met Eren. At the time they hadn't seemed too significant, just another soldier glad to be done with the fighting, even if it was through the shaky means of a marriage. 

Now Hange resembled nothing of the earnest, diplomatic leader you'd met. They sat on a desk, their presence looming above you, legs spread on the chair in front of them. Their ruby eyes were intense behind scratched up glasses. 

"Tell me, how can we trust that you're not a trap?" They muttered lowly in an even voice. 

You take a small gulp, knowing very well that your next words would determine far more than just your own fate. 

"I only married Eren because I wanted peace, and now he is going to destroy the world." You say with a shaky breath. "You are the only ones left to stop him." 

Hange stares at you for a long, heavy moment, but it is their lieutenant who speaks first. "And as such, you know that we cannot afford to take any risks, not even to trust you." 

You feel a coldness grow in the room, as if the gazes of everyone there magnifies on you, their swords and guns becoming even more apparent. 

If you are not an ally, then you are the enemy...

"Eren is not sly enough to send a spy." A severe voice from behind you says coldly and you jump. "He is too focused on power, and on doing things himself." Mikasa mutters. 

Even Armin looks surprised, you gaze whips back to Hange, who nods slowly, clearly thinking deeply. 

"You knew him best, Mikasa." The Commander says slowly after a moment. Their red eyes glance up, boring into your own. "If you say we can trust her, then we will... for now." 

Your heart skips a beat at the realization that Mikasa had just vouched for you. Despite being the wife of her enemy, who'd betrayed her in the cruelest way possible, she had protected you, in a sense. 

You make the mental note to thank her later. 

After explaining El Mundo to the Commander, the room is dead silent again. 

"You are asking us to stop Eren before he leaves Paradis then?" Armin breaths, staring at you with wide, ocean eyes. 

You nod slowly. "If Eren makes a move toward the Peninsula, then they will react and bomb Paradis. And if that fails, Eren will destroy the Peninsula, and there will be no hope of stopping him." 

"We know where they are though, and we know where they are headed; the harbor." Mikasa says grimly, her hand is clenching the handle of her blade under the table in rage. "Armin can transform into the Colossal Titan and destroy their forces, and hopefully disorient Eren." 

Your hands had begun shaking at this point, and you didn't bother to listen to the rest of the plan. So much you had endured at that camp, so much you had risked to escape it, to now have to return to it so soon terrified you. 

Eren lay next to you that night while you tried to sleep. At least that's what you saw. You knew he wasn't really there, but that didn't stop him from looking so sad... so alone. 

"Why are you doing this to me?" You whisper, staring across at him through sleepy eyes. The Scouts had given you a spare bed in the closet, and you hadn't failed to notice the click of the lock before they left, ceiling you inside for the night. 

"Wouldn't anyone go to such lengths to protect the things they love?" Eren mutters back softly, his bright green eyes dulls and faded. That is how you know he is not really there. 

You force a dry laugh, but it comes of a more of a strangled sound. You try to ignore how his words hurt your heart. "Don't bullshit me." You mutter coldly. 

Eren sighs, rolling onto his back to stare up at the ceiling. "I hope one day you understand... I hope one day they tell you, because it's killing me." He whispers, his long brown hair splaying across the makeshift pillows. You feel the urge to run your fingers through that silky hair, but you don't.

"I hate you." You mutter, glaring at him. "I hope whatever it is really does kill you." But you have a hard time meaning that when he tilts his face to you, his faded eyes sad and pained, constricting your chest ever so slightly. 

"That's probably for the best." Eren admits, staring down slightly. You have half the mind to inquire what he means by that, but Eren continues, glancing up at you again. "You should get some sleep, I'll see you soon birdie." 

And in the morning when you wake, he is not there, and you know that you have truly gone mad. 

"The sooner this is over the better." You grumble to yourself, ripping aside the thin sheets and stepping onto the cold stone floor to get out of bed. 

But Eren's last words still ring in your mind. 

"I'll see you soon, birdie." 

You sure hope you're ready for that. 

...

Three months, how y'all doing?

Honestly I kinda just want to finish this book before season 4 pt 2 starts coming out so hopefully that'll happen, idk

Thank you for reading!!! <3