"He's my everything, my one only. I'd never thought I'll hurt him this much..." - AmberShey
Im Amber Shey, 15 years old. A typhical High School student. Im not that smart, Im not beautiful, Im not that tall. I love being simple and Im contented with who I am.
He is Xavier Angel, Beautiful name, right? He's my angel. He's handsome and cute, very sweet.
We're cuddling at his room, [were not doing that thing, huh! ] not thinking all our problems we just want to be with each other. He's so caring and smooth that why i love him so much. naputol ang madrama kong panimula at nagulat ng nagsalita siya. "Baby? ano po iniisip mo, hm?" "Wala... masaya lang ako kase andyan ka. " saka niya ko niyakap. then I hugged him back. that day ends happily cuddling each other. but there's something, something na bumabagabag sa isip ko. It feels like I want to cry but I don't know why.
Tomorrow...
"Good morning baby, Im not feeling well :(" - I sent him a message.
"good morning, iloveyouu.
y? okay ka lang ba? wag ka na pumasok kung di mo kaya?"- His reply.
pero pumasok pa din ako. I cant really breathe but I need to past my projects to complete my grades. after passing dumukdok lang ako sa desk at nagpahinga. but still hirap padin ako sa paghinga. Xav and Jay-L may bestfriend didn't let me stay there. they sent me home to have enough rest. When I got home, I released my pleghm and I was shocked that there's a blood. I calmed myself first and I said it to my mom. My mom sent me to a doctor. At nangyari na ang pinaka kinatatakutan kong bagay.
"She has a Lung disease and maybe it will lead to cancer."
I remember when I was 4 years old, I had lung disease but it was healed. and now I cant believed that its back.
I didnt show any shockness or fear. sinawalang bahala ko nalamang ang pangyayaring iyon at pinalakas ang loob ko. sinabi ko yun kay Jay-L.
Until, One day I was walking with Xav and Jay-L then everything turns black.
Nung nagising ako hawak-hawak ni Xav ang kamay ko. tulog siya, hinaplos ko ang mukha niya. Maybe he knows already. yeah youre right my lung disease becomes cancer. nagising siya at tumulo ang luha sa kanyang mga mata. I felt pain seeing him crying. "Bakit di mo sinabi? " alam na nga niya. "Ayoko lang mag alala ka." I wiped his tears. "tignan mo oh ayokong umiiyak ang baby ko." A tear fell down my eyes I cant help it. "wag mo ko iiwan. sabi ni Mommy ayaw mo daw magpagamot? Baby, paano ka gagaling?" tanong niyang parang takot na takot. kitang-kita ko sa mata niya ang lumbay at takot na mawala ang isang bagay at alam kong ako yun. "Sorry" yan nalang ang nasabi ko."fight for me. please." tumango nalamang ako. Mahal na mahal ko siya kaya kahit na alam kong walang kasiguraduhan ang magiging resulta lalaban ako para sa kanya.
Days and months passed.Hes always there caribg for me but My body felt weak and tiredness but my heart cant give up. everytime, I'd see him cry. it really tears me apart. I'd promise him forever. I dont want to see him in pain.
A year of fighting this cancer passed. Im really weak and I know the time is near. I think I cant fight anymore. Ayoko pumikit baka di na ko dumilat pa. baka di ko na siya makita't makapagpaalam.
That night, inalala ko lahat simula nung unang pagkikita hanggang ngayon. ayokong sumuko. ayokong nakikita kang ganyan at ayoko kita iwan. Mahal na mahal kita Xavier Angel, Youre my angel, My everything, My one and only and I never thought Id hurt you this much..."
