The flute amidst a sea of flowers

Drown by insanity

"Here's your new supply of suppressing pills. Make sure to take them daily."
"Mhm"
"The lantern rite festival is in a few days. If there's anything you want to report to you can go find Ganyu and she will send words to me."
"Ok"
"Then I'll be going."

It has already been a week since I last saw Venti. I'm still not sure whether if he will come to the lantern rite festival.

My demonic karma have returned as usual and days went by smoothly and the pills worked well. Until the days before the lantern rite festival where everything went wrong.

_____________________________________________________

"Shut the fuck up."

Come on, you know the only thing you've ever known is killing and slaughter.

"I don't need it."

How absurd. It really makes me laugh.

"Just shut up already and get the fuck out of my mind."

But I am your mind..pffft

"Shut up! I don't want to hear anything from you."

And also who is that person who gave you the flute? The flute really suppressed me to my weakest. What the hell was that. You should've destroyed it.

"..."

Ugh. Why is it back. Fuck. And it's even stronger than before. I even took the pills Morax gave me. I'm emitting strong demonic karma and I can't seem to control it.

My vision got blurry the more time had pass and my headache is worsening. Why now.

I quickly went inside and took two pills. It wasn't enough. I hurriedly chugged the whole bottle of pills. It was still not enough. Shit. I look in the mirror and I see a face I haven't seen for a long time. I was drooling and growling like a wild animal. It looked inhuman that it made me mad. I took my spear and went out quickly disgusted by the me I saw.

Well look at you. The true self. Your true desires. This is the you, you should be. The true you.

"Shut up!"

*snickers* quit the acting Xiao

Xiao? Each time he says my name, the sound resonates through my eardrums and echoing in my mind. This doesn't sound good. It means he's dead serious and things can possibly go terribly wrong at this point.

Voices of the people I've killed tumultaniously filled my ears. My mind went blank and numb.

Fuck. I needed to kill something.

Returning to your senses, now?

"Fucking stop this"

This is only natural for you to desire killing.

"Shit"

My body didn't want to listen to me and went straight outside to kill demons and monsters. Blood splattered everywhere and my mind went completely blank as I've left my consciousness behind killing everything on my way.

I don't remember much of what happened as I was slaughtering demons and monsters. I could no longer feel the time passing. The pain was numb and I was indulged into slaughtering anything on my way. I was once drenched in the smell of blood. The demonic karma couldn't get off, instead it increased.

Fuck. Why isn't it gone. I've killed more than usual what is happening to me. My head went through a shock of pain and past memories came gushing through my mind. I couldn't open my eyes as I was in a pitiful state. Hand supporting my head as I could barely walk. I kept killing until I wasn't so sure how many days have passed.

I was slowly loosing my mind and was experiencing pain shock. Past memories rushing through my mind as I couldn't count the hours I've spent killing monsters.

This wasn't looking good, I had to go somewhere safe and find a solution to this unusual behavior.

I fled to Liyue thinking I could ask Ganyu for a stronger bottle of supressing pills. I have to get this shit over before the lantern rite. Or else I would go rampage and lose all control. This some sort of thing happened to me long ago, before I met Morax. I was loosing my conciousness and my sanity was already long gone. I was a space created by my mind, kept by strings holding myself in air, as I couldn't move am inch. It was Morax who saved me from that dead pit. I don't remember clearly how since I was drained lifeless for weeks. I was probably passed away. Morax didn't tell me about the details but warned me if this kind of symptoms happened to me I should report it to him immediately.

I didn't chose to report him this time as I didn't want to interrupt Morax in the lantern rite preparations.

I was slowly loosing my sanity over and I felt like each step someone was pulling my legs down as it wants me to drown underground.

So you haven't turned yourself in

"Shut up!!"

Haha what a feisty bastard. Still unwilling to turn yourself in.

"Fuck you!"

Haha don't fret. Soon we will be one.

That was the last thing that I heard in my mind before I went blank and went through some painful shit.

As soon I've arrived at the Yujing terrace, I saw Ganyu, talking with people preparing the festival, returning her head towards and went very surprised as she ran towards me with a worried face.

"Xiao!"

I couldn't hear clearly as I was reaching my limit. I was about to collapse. I turned my head to the side and saw the blood from the monsters I've killed formed a line from leading from where I came from. Blood was still dripping from my clothes and my vision was red from the blood.

"Are you ok!? Xiao!"

After that I felt the icy floor near my face. I probably collapsed on the ground. I entered a deep slumber as the other me took possession of my current body. This demonic karma really do want to go his way. I was probably going wild on rampage killing people and destroying things. I had no energy left in my body to stop this. My conscience left me and I've sunk deep into a space created by my mind. Deep down a black pit.