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tw: panic attacks

Your life 'before', as the rest of the TVA team put it, was pretty normal. You were a hunter, but everyone seemed to come to talk to you about their problems, probably because you always knew how to help, exactly what to say.

Maybe that was why you landed a new job 'after'.

Now, a Loki variant, Sylvie, was incharge along with another Loki variant, known to the workforce that served him as 'TVA Loki'. Anyway, Sylvie had set up a slightly different system from 'before', and had decided that the TVA needed a therapist. To be honest, you had no idea how she knew about you, considering you didn't really know about her until she took over, but she was insistent.

Your job was interesting, certainly. Old variants they brought in from gods knows where would come and spill their trauma into your lap. TVA workers who had decided to know about their past life before becoming a variant would come to cry about lost loves ones with you. Not that you minded. You were good at this, helping people cope with their mental state.

One time, you were talking to the kid Loki variant when you had the sudden desire to do something different. You remember this particular case - one of your friends had pruned him theirself.  The variant, killed Thor. By himself. He regretted it a lot, and you supported him, guiding him though the story of how it happened, the trauma of the void. You were surprised how little you knew about the boys' life, so made a vow to know the person you were seeing backstory before they came.

Your next slot was another hunter, h-54. You knew him. And so, you pulled out a file with his name stamped across it and took a deep breath before opening it. Personally, you didn't want your memories returned, for fear of what you would find. And h-54 is a perfect example of why. Born in 1870, he had a family. Three kids, the oldest of which was only 8 when he got pruned. But that wasn't it. Some people had come to his house in the middle of the night, murdering his wife and youngest. He, however, managed to get the other 2 kids out via a hole under the fence. that wasn't supposed to happen. All 5 of them meant to die that night, so the timeline got pruned. The end. You put down the file and kick back on your chair, actually understanding why Sylvie hated his place. It ripped away peoples' lives, love, family and so much more. 

-------------------------------------------------

You carried on this process for a long time after that, some people having to come back for more, their allotted time space not big enough to talk through all their problems. After a while, you became good at knowing how long someone will need. Occasionally, really tragic stories hits, and you have to take a few days off to look after yourself. So, you learn to read about your patient at least 3 weeks in advance to know when to book leave. The TVA, in general, was improving and visits to your room became less and less frequent.

You were on your lunch break, lying upside down when a particular folder catches your eye - 'Sylvie Laufeydottir' was stamped across the binding in deep red colouring. You cease the blood rush in your head and stand up to go grab it.

Stories of the leader of your establishment are always spreading across the work force, and even listening to them makes you want to invite the god for a chat. Reading her files, your body come to the conclusion that she needs serious help. And a hug. With such a lonely life, 6 hours might not even cover it. But you had to try, or you couldn't live with yourself.

The hard part would be getting her to agree. You could sense that. And there was only one person who could help. TVA Loki.

It's not that they were annoying or anything, no more than the other Lokis'. He was just impossible to talk to. But you knew that you couldn't ask Sylvie directly, otherwise she'll probably fire you.