When Desire Strikes (18+)

GxB : My Vampire Lord

What do you do when you have seen every possible darkness at the young age of eight?

You embrace it's presence and forget light exists.

I don't know which social worker facilitated the transfer of my guardianship to the Mansion when my father in an alcohol-induced rage smashed life out of my drug-addled mother in my presence. Noise complaint by my neighbours saved me from certain death that day.

A short car-ride later I found myself at this place which felt darker than the place I'd left behind. Something told me the people here were not like the ones I had met so far. It wasn't their pasty- white complexion, their hushed tones or the red liquid they always seemed to drink, it was the emptiness in their eyes which seemed to pull me in and I knew if I allowed it would devour me whole.

Miriam, the cook was assigned to take care of me. She was a strict, stout and loyal woman, whose loyalty lay with the master who owned the Mansion. She was like me. She too had been saved from certain misery possibly equal to mine for I never heard her not follow any instructions she received even from the snobby, good-for-nothing guests which we used to receive on a routine basis populating the wide halls, richly furnished multiple rooms of the Mansion.

I had managed to catch only glimpses of the Master in all my time there. It was like he was a shadow which used to turn into smoke the moment I tried to get a closer look. Everyone including the guests referred to him as their Lord.

Maybe it was nowhere mentioned in the file the social worker gave them but the day I came used to be considered as my birthday here. Miriam used to treat me to her rare smile and hand me my birthday gift from the Master. It was always what I would want that year like he knew my dreams and innermost desires.

The day I turned eighteen the Mansion was closed for guests and Master stopped coming there altogether. Only staff like Miriam and I stayed there looking after the upkeep of the place. The gifts stopped too.

It felt like time had moved on and we were left behind. Like he had moved on.

What do you do when the only ray of light in the darkness of your existence abandons you?

You abandon yourself.

I was not brave enough to drink or take substances. I lost myself in the company of the people who did.

Maybe they reminded me of the family I lost. My eyes always looked empty to them. I always seemed drunk or high. My depression was so overwhelming they couldn't see the difference.

Ray was the guy I used to hang out with the most. There was no form of influence he hadn't tried and thrown out of his system. I was his latest muse. On my twentieth birthday he promised me a night of forbidden pleasure that no one would've given me so far. Little did he know, no one actually had given me such pleasures. That's because I thought myself too dirty and unworthy of it.

Miriam had been at the end of her control with my errant behaviour. The moment I tried to slip out on the night before my twenty-first birthday she warned me of dire consequences and the fact that she wouldn't be able to save me from them.

I don't even recall if I replied to her before slipping into the night.

When you've been lonely all your life you can sense company no matter how fleeting it feels. The whole walk till I reached our usual haunt it felt like someone was watching me, following me and I kept turning and checking every few steps but couldn't catch even a shadow.

The moment I reached I found Ray was the only one present there and he was sloshed beyond his senses. I tried telling him what I felt but he had his plans. He had started ripping my clothes apart before I could get a word out. Struggling against him was futile because he was bigger than me and the fear of a fate similar to my mother's froze me.