Adopted By One Direction

4.

Alexia's POV

I was beyond pissed off at the boys.

I gave Zayn permission to read one page. One page. Now, I was vulnerable. They knew all my secrets, they knew about Carter, and they knew about my dad.

They knew too much and it scared me to death.

I locked myself in my bedroom, pressing my back to the door. Sobbing, I sank down to the floor and ignored the boys yelling for me to come back downstairs. I drowned out their desperate yells with Bastille:

And you thought the lions were bad

well they tried to kill my brothers

I couldn't breathe as I felt the walls close in.

I moved away from the door as the boys began to throw their whole bodies against it. I carefully unlocked the door and jumped on the bed.

All five boys burst in and see me curled up in bed. Louis shooed the boys away as he sat on the edge of my bed, stroking my back lightly. He was humming a small tune. I sobbed into the pillow and tried to shoo his hand away. With every touch, I still resisted.

It may have been minutes, it may have been hours,but all I know is that Louis got up and left at some point. I stared out the window at the setting sun. I watch the shadows of my room fade into the floor.

I hear the door creep open and I glance at the clock. Midnight. I catch sight of Zayn's black hair in the lamplight. I fidget uncomfortably. Zayn doesn't move towards me, he simply whispers," I'm sorry." 

He must have thought I was asleep because he turned to go until I sat up," Zayn." I said. He froze and turned around," Alexia?" He asked. Dumbass. Who else would it be?

"It's okay. I forgive you...I think." He smiled gratefully at me. We then both sit in awkward, silent tension. He gestures to the stairs," Do you want to come down and eat? Are you hungry?" I nodded," I'll be right down."

First, I slipped into the bathroom for a quick cut. My hands itched to hold the cold blade in my hand. I cleaned up the blood, then ran downstairs.

Liam smiled at me warmly and handed me a bag with McDonald's in it. I raised an eyebrow at him," McDonald's at 12:30 in the morning?" I teased. He stuck a tongue out at me," Eat your food, you skinny thing."

I managed to nibble at the food and make a dent in it. Then I sat on the couch, where Niall sat next to me. I curled up next to him. He tentatively wrapped his arms around me, rubbing his hands up and down my arm to warm it.

I looked up at Niall. I hated hiding this from him, the cuts, I mean. But, this was a part of me.

I remember falling asleep, later, sprawled out on the couch.

Hours later, voices woke me from a sound slumber," I'll just lift up her shirt."

I felt pressure on my ankles and my wrists. Then, the cold air hit my stomach. My eyes shot open and I screamed as Louis gently pushed my shirt up under my chest. Niall was whispering comforting words in my ear, but I couldn't hear them over my screams. All five boys' eyes widened at the sight of the cuts and they all let me go.

Instinctively, I curled up into a ball, sobbing. I shied away from Harry's touch. Louis looked pissed.

"What the hell, Alexia? You were getting better-"

I cut him off," No, I was getting better at hiding it!"

"Alexia, whatever this is, we can deal with it."

"I am dealing! And stop treating it like its a mental disorder. I mean, it is, but I'm not special, so don't treat me like I am!" I screamed at them. The boys' faces softened and I looked up at them," I am no different than anyone else. Sure, I have scars. But in a way, we all do don't we?" I said, thinking of Harry's butterfly tattoo, Zayn's piercings, and other things that made the boys who they are.

I couldn't stay here anymore. I was on the verge of insanity.

"I want you to take me back to the orphanage."