I Want To Protect Her

Please forgive me..

-ALEX'S POV-

I woke up to a knock on my bed room door.

"Alex I'm going to Jake's."

"Alright.."

Jake was my moms new boyfriend. I was happy that she was happy but I didn't like Jake. Everytime he came over to the house he would sneak to my room when mom would fall asleep. He would either abuse me physically or sexually. I hadn't told Andy about it because I was scared my mom would call me a lier an kick me out of the house so I just stayed quiet.

I looked at my phone an noticed I had 3 texts from Andy.

Andy-Alex I'm sorry if I upset you today.. I hope I wasn't the reason you cried at school..

Andy-Alex are you up?

Andy-I guess you fell asleep.. Just please don't hurt yourself.. I love you alex. <3

I wiped away the tears on my cheeks an replied.

Alex-Yeah I fell asleep.. It wasn't you Andy. I'm  ok. Good night I love you.

I turned on my radio an listened to the mix CD Andy gave me for my birthday last year. It was his bands first CD. I then went of to the picture of me and Andy I had on the wall. I removed it an untaped the blade from the back of it. I went to the bed with the picture in one hand an the blade in the other. I decided to make a video an when I was done I posted it to twitter an facebook. I sat down in the corner of the room with my blade an cried. I couldn't make up my mind if I should go through with this or if I shouldn't. I started having flash backs.

(2nd grade)

"Hey little baby!" I looked up to see Brad walking over to me. "Leave me alone Brad. I just wanna play." I started to walk away an was shoved to the ground. Brad sat on my back an started pulling my hair. "OWW! Stop it! Let me go! Help!" I cried but I knew no one was coming to help me. Suddenly Brad was pulled off of me an I looked to see a boy with long black hair dressed all in black punching Brad until he finally let Brad get up an run away. " Pick on someone your own size an gender Brad!" The boy then walked over to me an extended his hand with a smile on his face. "Are you ok?" He asked as I took his hand an dusted my cloths off. "Yeah. Thank you." I looked up at the boy who was still smiling so I smiled back. "My names Andrew Biersack, but call me Andy." I smiled back an said "Nice to meet you Andy. I'm Alex Mattox."

(9th grade)

"Oh come on Alex it's not that bad. Just take your shirt off for me." Josh my first boyfriend kept trying to pull my shirt up but I kept shoving it down. "No. I told you I don't do that." He pinned me against my bedroom wall and started slidding his hands up my shirt." I tried to shove him away but I couldn't. "No! Stop it! Help!" I knew no one was home an started to regret not inviting Andy when my bedroom door shot open. I saw Andy rip Josh away from me an the got into a huge fight which resulted in Josh having a busted nose, busted lip, an his forhead was busted open from where Andy slammed him into my wall. Andy had a busted lip an that was it. Josh ran from my house an I ran into Andy's arms. "Thank you so much!" I sobbed into his chest. He hugged me tight. "No problem. I'm always here. You know that." I looked up at him an saw blood on his lip so I went an got a wet paper towel an a piece of ice. I cleaned up his face an placed the ice to his lip. "What made you come to my house?" He winced when the ice touched his lip then looked into my eyes. "I told you I didn't trust him, so I came over an sat on the stairs. When I heard you yell no. I knew you were in trouble." I cried an hugged him tight against his chest.

I was brought out of my flash backs by I loud bang on my door.

"Hey! Hey Alex are you ok?!"

"Leave me alone!"

"Alex come on just open the door!"

"No! Leave me alone Andy!"

"Alex jus-"

I placed the blade on my arm dug it deep across my wrist. I tried not to scream but I couldn't hold it back.

"Alex!"

My vision went black an I laid down in the floor. The last thing I remember was a crashing sound then I heard Andy calling my name.