Journals (Spencer Reid x Reader)

Recovery

Things had been going well with Spencer. Lila seemed to have disappeared after Spencer convinced you that the two of you should just block her and erase her from your lives, which both of you did. You felt kinda bad, since she clearly has some things going on in her life that cause her to feed off of drama, but like Spencer pointed out, that is not your problem to worry about. If she wants to heal, she will, and if she doesn't, then she will just bring everyone down with her.

You still were a bit jealous and somewhat nervous about his relationship with JJ. The photo that Lila sent you wasn't necessarily bad, but you knew about the crush he had on her for the longest time, and you weren't actually sure if it had gone away completely. Nonetheless, you decided to push it to the back of your mind and enjoy the moment with your boyfriend.

Spencer has been the perfect boyfriend. He has been there for you as much as he could with both of your work schedules. He pampers, pays attention, and adores you as much as possible. Things were finally looking up after weeks of darkness.

The two of you were enjoying each other's company, watching a movie on your shared couch when the doorbell rang. It was Lila. That was incredibly unexpected. You both ignore it, and pretend you're not home.

"Spencer, Y/N, I see your cars out here. I know you're in there. I just want to talk."

"I'm just gonna buzz her in," you say.

"Are you crazy? We finally got rid of her and now she's back," Spencer whispered.

"We're in a better place now, Spence," you smile as you buzz her in.

As Lila gets up to the apartment door, she knocks and you swing the door open. "So why are you here?" you ask.

"Listen, I know you two don't wanna see me, so I will just say it quickly. I acknowledge that I have hurt you both individually and as a couple, and I wish that I could say that was never my intention, but that would be a lie. I fell in love with not Spencer, but with the idea of him. He is very handsome, and sweet, and flirtatious," she smirked at him. That one stung a little bit, but it helped that he glared back at her.

She continued, "He's very smart and charismatic, and I haven't had a healthy relationship in my entire life. I thought he could give that to me, finally. But, I have come to realize that what I thought we had was superficial. A fling, and it can barely be called that. I wanted him at the time though, but then I met you. And you have such a big heart, to have tried to befriend me and care for my feelings during all of this, and then to have been able to forgive Spencer for everything. I just wanted to say that I am sorry, and I really hope you two know how lucky you are," she smiles.

Spencer couldn't stand hearing that, because he had the intuition that the entire speech was insincere, so he had retreated to the bedroom. As Lila begins to walk out the door, she quickly spins around to face you. "Oh, I almost forgot! Here," and she hands you a plastic bag.

"What's this?" you ask.

"Oh, some of Spencer's stuff he left at my place. It's a pair of sweats, his boxers, and the box of condoms. We only used 2, and I'm sure they're still good!" she says and nearly runs out of the apartment complex.

You are stunned. Everyone talks about fight or flight responses, but you froze - the less common 'f.'

Without a word to Spencer, you leave the apartment.

---Spencer's POV---

How could she even think that she could come to our home? Why would Y/N let her in?

Surely Lila is gone, I wonder what else she said to Y/N. I hope she didn't fall for that fake apology.

"Where are you babe?" he called out, with no response.