Get Down On Your Knees And Tell Me You Love Me (Merrikat)

Chapter Thirteen

Jack

Its been a week since I gave Zack a blow job. And it's all been wonderful. We rotate sleeping in each other's bunks and honestly, I sleep better than I have since high school.

I've been kissing him on stage, but the fans just think it's friendly kisses. I want to tell the fans, but I need Zack's approval. I need Zack.

I tap his chest lightly, waiting for him to wake up. It doesn't work. I climb on him slowly, so I'm straddling him. I apply a bit of pressure in between our packages, but he still doesn't wake up. He moans a small, "J-Ack." But that's it. I grind slowly before his eyes spring open and he hungrily leans up to kiss me. I smile into the kiss, loving it. "Not on the bus, babe. I have to talk to you.." I say quietly, afraid of even asking. He sits up, pulling me into his lap as he does so. "What is it, baby?" He asks patiently, and softly, using just the right tone. "I-" I say, not being able to finish. "Please?" He asks, sticking out his lower lip slightly. I sigh. "I want to tell the fans that we're dating." I say in one breath, hopeful that he doesn't care.

He looks away, never making eye contact, before he said, "No." It felt like a stab in my heart, and I got hurt very quickly. "What? Are you ashamed of me??" I ask tears running down my cheeks now. "No, Jack- I just. Don't want everyone knowing. Okay?" He said, making me angry. "So you don't want anyone to fucking know about us." I said, before jumping out of the bunk. "Im going for a run." He said angrily. I quickly styled my hair and put on new clothes before tweeting, "@JackAllTimeLow: Boner Springs, Kansas! *Bonner. My bad, come meet me at our tent now!" I walked to the tent, aided with sunglasses, and a hoodie. Hopeful that nobody recognized me before I got there. I sat on our merch table, the side with the fans, just chilling.

I took hundreds of pictures, I signed clothes, phones, hats, skin, etc., and I got to talk to my fans. I heard their stories, not just saw their faces in the crowd. I made it through everyone in the line with just enough time to run to the signing location. I sat down in my seat, feeling Zack's eyes on me, but not making eye contact with him. Not even looking at him.

About ten of the people from the merch table were here also! I tried to guess their names, and got them all right. Fuck, I love these fans.

-

Rian ran out onto the stage, earning a roar from the crowd. Then my beloved Zack ran out, and I couldn't help but stare at his ass the whole time, the crowd cheered louder. I look at Lex, who quickly said, "Get out there, Barakat!" But I didn't go, I looked at him in the eye, and said, "I have something planned for tonight, follow my lead." He nodded, "Love you, Gaskarth." He smiled at those words, "Love you too, even if you're a goofball. Now get on stage!" He said, smacking my ass as I ran on stage, screaming.

Running on stage in front of hundreds of fans who are there purely to see you is an amazing feeling.

"You all give me a Boner, Boner Springs, Kansas!" I yelled into my mic, right before Lex ran on stage. He immediately greeted the crowd correctly, "Kansas! Look at all you sexy motherfuckers. This song is called Bad Enough For You and it goes a lot like this." We made it about halfway through the set before I stopped everyone.

"Boner Springs, get your cameras out and start recording. I want all of these videos tweeted at me tonight. And if you met me today at our merch table, tweet me that picture but one ONCE so it's fair. Okay back to what I was saying. I met this guy," I started, before they began chanting 'JALEX! JALEX!' And I stopped them, "Guys, it's not Lex. Let me finish. He makes me run in circles, and I'd run from lions for him. He makes me want to break out! Break out of my shell. All I want is to be six feet under the stars with him, and no one else. He makes me shameless, I remember every Sunday with him, and he's even got me poopin' champagne. I would get lost in Vegas with him every night if I could, and you can come one, come all to our wedding," at this point, I snuck a glance at Zack, who was not on his half of the stage, but yet right next to me, looking into my eyes. "Not yet, cowboy, I planned this." I said, stopping him from kissing me. But I continued my speech while looking into his eyes, holding his hands, "You make me feel weightless, and I'd never fuckin' break your heart in two. I'm tired of these sick little games and all I want is you. Too much of you would never be too much, you are my therapy, and I desperately need to get lost in you, not stereo. I was damned either way, so I did you. And I've already broken down my walls for you. I will never stop painting flowers for you, I promise. I don't think I'll ever be bad enough for you, but it's okay because you are my only one. I will get down on my knees every fuckin' night if it proves that I love you. You are my hero, but yet you're still a daydream away. I'll always return the favor, and we can live under a paper moon if you'd let me draw one. This took a lot of guts to say, but you make me feel like dancin', so do you want me? Or do you want me dead?"

I finally finished my speech, and I looked up, and kissed the fuck out of him. When we finally finished, I snuck a glance at Lex, who was almost crying. He pulled his mic up to his mouth, and spoke, "Zack, if you don't want him, that's dirty work." The crowd roared. Cheering "Merrikat!" Zack grabbed my mic, and looked into my eyes before speaking, "Jack, I've wanted you since high school." I kissed him again, but just a peck, before taking my mic from him and thanking the crowd, "Thanks for letting me get that out guys, this song is called I Feel Like Dancin'!"

After we finished Dear Maria, Lex thanked the crowd, Ry threw his sticks to the crowd, as the other 3/4 of All Time Low threw a few picks sporadically into the crowd.

Zack and I walked hand in hand to the bus, but we didn't go straight there. We went to the back of the crowd, and took pictures with fans again. Once the gates to the venue closed, and every fan was rushed out, we finally headed back to the bus. "Shower with me?" I asked Zack, who agreed immediately. We didn't do anything sexual, we just washed the places of each other that we couldn't reach ordinarily.

After that, I decided I'd make a dinner. I ran to KFC and got the bucket, bringing it back and feeding everyone. Everyone but Ry. I came through the door of the bus, immediately asking Zack for assistance, who was happy to help. Lex sat at the table, on FaceTime with Lisa and his dogs, I waved at them quickly before sorting out the door. "Where's Ry? And crew?" I asked Alex, who quickly turned to me and answered with, "Uh, Ry's in his bunk. He's got a migraine. And crew went to a party." I nodded and let him get back to his conversation.

I made Lex a plate, knowing exactly what he'd want: everything. I then did the same for Ry, handing Lex his plate on my way to the back lounge to give Ry his food and a few migraine pills. I turned the light out on my way out, knowing itd help him. "Hey Lex?" I asked, coming back into the room as Zack took our food to his bunk. "Yeah?" He asked, looking up at me. "Where's Cass?" I asked, causing him to look at Lisa on his phone. Although he had headphones on so I couldn't hear her. "Lise said she told her about fifteen minutes ago that she was 'gonna shower." I nodded. "Love you night, Lex." I said humbly as I crawled into Zack's bunk. "Goodnight, Jay! Love you!" I heard Alex call from the front room.

I took my phone out and texted Cass, "Gave Ry some food & migraine pills. KFC is on the counter. Update me on how he is often, night love you." And then I texted Lex, "Don't stay up all night looking up space. <3"

I ate my food, laying my head on Zack, while we scrolled through our mentions, retweeting all of the pictures and videos. "I love you, babe. And I'm so happy that you don't hate me." I spoke into the dense, night air. "I love you too, baby. I could never hate you after that speech." He said quietly, laying down and pulling me so my head would be on his chest. We shoved the plates off into the corner. He kissed my forehead, and before I knew it I was drifting off into the oblivion of dreamland.

This is how life should be.