cold | k.s.b

002

Somehow, I managed to catch the third subway after missing the first two. I was home. 

Home. 

That is a very pleasant way of describing where I lived. It was somber and dark, no child should have been raised in a place so void. Though it was luxurious. My father paid for it in cash. He didn't want to risk getting caught via credit card. Very paranoid that man.

The walls were tall and they curved slightly towards the top. I always thought it was funny how they weren't completely straight. They were a charcoal color, along with the floor and the ceiling. The only memorable decor pieces were an alluring chandelier that glowed a warm yellow in comparison with the walls, and a rug made up of the bright orange and black fur that once surrounded a tiger. Both were in the living room. I didn't do much living in there. 

I didn't do much living at all actually. 

I walk in the door, instantly hit with the warmth from the heater. I must've left it on. I was thankful for that though. The subway station was freezing so the heat felt amazing. I could feel my muscles relax. Like I could finally breathe. 

I walk over to the decanter on the island that holds scotch. My father's favorite. He always had his cellar stocked with the most expensive alcohol and his decanter filled to the brim. I guess, oddly enough, that habit of his just stuck with me. Though, I never really drank. I chose not to because, with a job like mine, it's best to be on high alert, even in your own home. But after the night I've had, I deserve at least one drink. I grab a glass out of the cabinet and pour myself a plentiful amount. 

I then take my glass and have a seat at the dining table. 

500 million won.

I wish I could apologize to my mother for failing her. She didn't deserve to be caged up like an animal for this long. She deserves a life of love and peace, nothing but the best. But she couldn't ever have it. 

Because I fucked up. 

I take one large swig of the malty beverage from my class before chucking it against the wall. The glass hits the flat surface with great force and breaks into numerous tiny pieces. I watch the alcohol slide down the wall, making it appear darker than it already is. 

I slouch back into my chair, feeling a gentle poke in my left hip. I move my hand to my side and open my jacket pocket to see what it was. The card. 

The experience with the strange man at the subway station. The ddakji and the money. I assumed it was a just a weird dream I had while resting. But I didn't rest. It was real.  

"It will give you the chance to make a lot more money than this" His words replay in my mind.

I have nothing left but my mom. I would make a deal with the devil to get her back. To hug her. Fortunately for me, all I have to do is win a few games and get paid for it. With the money, I can pay off what I owe to the police department, then save what is left for my mom. I doubt it will be enough to pay her captors completely, but at least this money will get me back in the killing field to earn more. For her.

I take a deep breath and flip the card over so the phone number is now facing me.

I stand up, in order to get my phone out of the back pocket of my jeans. I grabbed the cold metal box and was quick to unlock it. I opened the app that allows me to make calls and hesitantly typed the number in.

010-034

I stare at the small green button, determining whether I should press it or not. I inhale deeply, as I'm buying myself time.