(lowercase intended)
yes, this is based off of the album 'red' by taylor swift (i love her, don't judge me), so if you could keep your comments and opinions to yourself if you don't like her, that would be great. :)
this story is loosely based off of polaroid project on ao3, so if you see any similarities to it, that's why.
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~*~* michael's pov *~*~
losing him was blue like i'd never known.
splat. blue paint hit the canvas that was once a boring, plain white, turning it into a mix of colors. my hand moved swiftly as i gripped my paintbrush.
missing him was dark gray, all alone.
whenever i painted, all that i was capable of creating was something related to luke. i created memories, i created feelings, i created us - what used to be us.
something that i had ruined.
forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you've never met.
it had been almost one year since the best year of my life came to an end. i still couldn't find a way to get luke out of my head. tomorrow i started my first day of college, NYU to be exact. it was the school luke and i planned to attend together when we discussed our future, expecting each other to be apart of it.
but loving him was red.
i looked at the creation i just finished, paint scattered across my arms and my clothes. the painting was another memory between luke and i, how the stars looked on the night i told him about my passion for art.
remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes.
~*~*~*~
"can't you just smile normally for one picture? just one? that's all i'm asking," he pouted his bottom lip as i continued to hide my face and tried holding back a smile.
i didn't move my hands away from my face until i felt hands on my sides starting to tickle my ribcage. my eyes shot wide open as i tried to wiggle in the grass to escape his grip.
an involuntary smile was plastered on my face and laughter began to flow from my mouth. his laughter followed mine and i looked up to see his warm and familiar smile.
i smiled up at him as he was now straddling my waist, his soft hair just barely moving in the soft autumn breeze.
like the colors in autumn so bright just before they lose it all.
"you have the most beautiful smile, but when i'm old and fragile i'll never be able to remember it because you never let me take any damn pictures of it," he teased, poking my stomach playfully.
i held back a smile as i avoided his gaze, averting my eyes away from him and onto the stars above the two of us. suddenly, his lips were pressed against mine, taking my attention away from anything but him. my eyes closed as i kissed him back, reaching my hands out to grab him and pull him closer.
but just as soon as they had greeted me, his lips parted from mine. i opened my eyes to smile at him.
*flash*
"i will be keeping that one," he grinned at the picture he took with the polaroid camera he got last christmas.
my jaw dropped as i pushed him off me and sat up with a jolt. he took a pen out from his back pocket after he laid down on his back next to where i was now sitting. he scribbled something at the bottom of the picture before turning it around to show me what it said.
'beautiful'
i let out a deep, angry groan, "i'm going to kill you luke."
"i think i might enjoy that," he smirked, making me roll my eyes.
"shut up," i mumbled, failing at keeping a smile off my face.
i gave up on pretending to be angry at him and curled up next to him on the grass. he grabbed his camera and took a picture of the starry sky.
"wow," i said as i looked at the picture he had just taken.
he turned his head to look at me, "what?"
"it's just, your photography is amazing. you're so talented and passionate about it and i just... never mind."
"no, tell me," he argued, shaking my arm as if it would help persuade me to continue.
"well i kind of have something i'm really passionate about. and... this is really stupid," i sighed, "i've never told anyone about this before - not because it's a big deal or anything, i just didn't think anyone would really care - but, um, i really like art i guess. i'm not even that good at it, but, like, i'm really captivated by it. like paintings, drawings, music, poetry... it's all art to me. and you probably think i sound really stupid, but, like... yeah."
his confused expression was replaced by a smile as he rubbed small circles on my arm with his thumb, "it's not stupid, do you really think that somebody who is as big of a photography nerd as me could think that what you just said is stupid? of course not! and if you wouldn't mind... i'd really like to see you art sometime."
i looked up to meet his gaze, "i'd love to show you."
~*~*~*~
regretting him was like wishing you never found out that love could be that strong.
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this was loooooong over due so yeah sorry about that and i hope this doesn't suck
