Tit for Tat (GojoHime) - Part 1

Twenty Seven

Gojo had learned how to teleport at such an early age that it was as natural to him as jumping from one step to the next on a shallow flight of stairs.

When he wasn't drunk that was.

Teleporting when drunk was like going down a steep hill covered in ice. In the dark. And in his rather advanced state of drunkenness, it was like jumping off a high cliff into infinity. Blind.

This was going to be bumpy.

Darkness engulfed them. Utahime screeched and threw both her hands around his middle to hold on for dear life. Gojo's drunken brain took interest in her soft breasts pressing against his solar plexus just as his left hand went to the hollow of her back for assurance. Though once there, his drunken brain made him want to move the hand lower, to confirm a long held suspicion: that underneath her prissy traditional miko outfit, this woman was hiding a fine little body with a tight, round ass.

Uhm... hell no, he needed to concentrate.

There were stories about unskilled Jujutsu Sorcerers losing themselves in the Void, never to return. Of course, those were just stories, spread to scare away the weak from trying something above their skill levels - but he had to admit that for the briefest of moments, folding time and space took a bit of an effort. Cursed energy felt slippery like a fish and unsubstantial like smoke in his hand.

Okay, this was going to be very bumpy. But he was Gojo Satoru, the greatest Jujutsu Sorcerer in the world and there was nothing he could not do. Even when deplorably drunk.

They fell on his bed together - hard. The impact knocked the wind out of him briefly, a sharp pain piercing his skull when the Void receded and Matter sorted itself into place. He threw his free arm up to shield his eyes, but it wasn't enough to block out the sensory onslaught that hammered his senses like red-hot iron nails. He groaned. When had he lost his glasses?

On top of him, Utahime lay trembling, breathing much too fast. Her Cursed Energy wavered around her in fierce purple colors, lapping against his Infinity in painful intensity. He was just about to tell her to stop fretting, since everything was fine - of course it was, even though he normally took people on a smooth ride in a luxury limo while she had been treated to the Datsun 510 version on a potholed road - when she raised her head off his chest and started hitting him with hard little fists. Which was utterly pointless but he wisely refrained from telling her that.

"Don't - thump - Ever - thump - Do - thump - That - thump - AGAIN!" she screamed, "you imbecile!"

Then she scrambled off him, all hands and feet, sharp elbows and pointy knees, rolling off the bed in a flurry of disheveled glory. He had lost his glasses - she had lost her silly ribbon and now her hair stuck out in all directions, making her look like a slightly deranged hedgehog.

"Where are we?" she pressed out, turning around in a full circle in an attempt to take in her environment.

"My apartment", he murmured, his head hurting more by the minute.

"In TOKYO???! No. Oh no. No, no, no!" she whimpered, scrambling to switch on the light by the door.

"Turn that off!" he groaned but she had already bolted out of the bedroom, turning lights on all over the apartment. Each new source of brightness added to his agony. Gojo grabbed one of the pillows and covered his face with it.

He heard Utahime rush around his apartment, muttering little assurances to herself. "This cannot be happening" - "Yes, but I'm still alive, so it's not as bad as it could be" - "Didn't I know as soon as I saw that idiot that it would end in a disaster?" - "I cannot stand him! Urgh!" She wandered out of his hearing range, then came back murmuring, "Stay calm, stay calm, breathe, think." Then, a sharp intake of breath and the exclamation, "Oh, wow, that's amazing!" from the living room.