Hope✔

Just move on!

Her day was over and she was packing her bags in an uninterested way. As usual she heard murmurs about her. People always say only one constant thing about her : She is always happy and she has no problems that she has a smile on her face always. But that's where people had made wrong! She had gone through cruel things that no girl should go through at this age! 

She soon packed and went out of the classroom to bus and her friends followed her. They are friends, but they are someone who don't even try to understand her hardships! How nice?

A girl who smiles always is now broken down at home. The girl who doesn't show her weak is now the weakest! Does she have anyone to share her problems? Nooo! And that's what sucks her.

The next day in break all started worrying about their problems.

Friend 1 : Everyone hates me! All say am very funny. My parents are not happy with my humor. I don't like myself. Because of these worries am sleeping only 6 hours everyday. I hate my life and I hate to live.

Swathi : Daa... You are not to use such big words! See I love you okay? And am there for you. I don't want you to worry about anything. Be strong dear! And you should get good sleep. Don't worry about anything. Everything will be fine one day. Just hope for it!

She said and passed on with a smile. But who knows here is a soul who takes sleeping pills everyday but still can't get sleep?

Friend 2 : My father fought with me today. Am yearning for someone's love. Why are fathers so annoying? He is not understanding me. I don't like him. My life would be better if he is a friendly and an understanding dad. 

Swathi : No dear! Fathers would be sometime annoying only when they think it is right. I don't know what your situation is, but father is always a father. Don't stop loving him. Maybe he can't understand your age and lifestyle. You should make him understand. Try talking to him and making him understand. I can't say whether the answer will be positive or negative. But sure there will be a change. Give it a try! Okay da?

Her friend nodded and she passed on with her fake adorable smile. Who knows her parents are going to get seperated in next six months in a divorce and she doesn't know with whom shall she live? She loves both equally, but her parents are firm in their divorce. She have no other choice right? She has to get seperated from one of them. Why does they give birth to a child when they can't live together?

Friend 3 : A man saw me in a wrong way today in bus stop. That haunts me. I don't want to face these kind of looks. The pain is real when someone sees us as an object.

Swathi : I agree di... But we should forget that at that minute. We shouldn't keep thinking about that. No girl could live without facing these disgusting looks even one day. This is our society. Maybe we can be able to change. But when we rise our voice, the plate will be turned towards our side. We will be helpless on that time. So the only way we have now is to ignore these and focus on your goals di. 

Swathi patted her shoulders lovingly and moved past her. But who knows she had experienced something bigger than that? She was raped and was left alone by her very own relative? 

At the end of the day, as usual she was alone at home in a devastated state. With tears stains she opened her diary, the only thing to whom she can share everything. She was good at expressing her pains through poems. She wrote down.

All my tears are spilled on my pillow,

But the next day I would go all in yellow

I never cared when all said am a fellow

But the hardest pain is

there was no one for me when I felt low.

With an heavy heart she closed the diary and thought about the person whom she loved so much. He was her mother, father everything. He meant the world to her. Maybe if he was there for her now, she may be having someone to stand for her. She closed her eyes and rewinded the beautiful moments spent with him. He was not her love, but something more than that. He was her uncle. Maybe for some it may sound simple. But for girls who love their uncle knows, how precious they are. For her, he was her best friend, best crime partner and everything for her. She was happy until he was alive. But that didn't last so long. He commited suicide because of this society. He had a problem in giving a child. The society started to talk ill about him. That made him to take the decision of suicide. He hung himself on the fan. As Swathi closed her eyes, the scene of seeing him hanging lifelessly still flashes in front of her eyes. He gave her only happiness. But what did she ever do to him? Finally she burnt him with her own hands as per his wish! Her heart was unable to bare the pain. So she gulped two sleeping pills with the hope atleast today she will fall asleep. But no! As usual sleep was far away from her.  

After 8 years :

Swathi was standing with a coffee cup in one hand and her old diary in another hand. She let out a painful smile as she read her old diaries.

Swathi : I had to go through a lot of things at the same time! Rape, death of uncle, parents divorce How did I face all these at such a small age? Indeed am strong!

Her mv : You should have said to someone about your harrassment.

Swathi : Yes i should have said. I know it is not good to keep it as a secret. The wrong ones should be punished for what they have did. But that bastard has a girl child. What did that child do to have this bastard as her father? If I say this to my parents, sure they will not be silent. They will voice out this matter. If that child comes to know about her father, it aches for her to think him as her father. She feels ashamed to have him as a father and starts hating all boys. Living without father's love is very tough. I don't want that little child to go through that. I want her to be happy. It's ok for me to cry. I lived with only the hope that life will change one day! Am glad that I had the maturity to face all these in the age of 15!

THE END

Author's note : 

       Maybe this would haven't been nice. But I wrote this as I badly want to convey my life as a message to you all. Today everyone has problems. Everyone goes through a lot of pain. But the only thing I want to say is, live with hope that our life will change one day. And am sure there will be a miracle one day. You shouldn't take any decision when you are angry. Please don't think to end your life at any stage. You still have time for that. God is just testing us. He is making you strong! 

I know I shouldn't reveal whom Swathi is. But my close circle insisted me to reveal her. That's me! Yes, this is a true story of your dear author of the things she went through in her age of 15. But I only hoped! Am strong enough now. Try to face all the problems with a small smile. You are indeed strong! Am a living example of a girl who faced cruel things, but still exists! 

I know this is not good. But the only thing I want to convey her is, never let your hope go! Suicides has become a simple thing nowadays. Maybe you had to go through many painful things. But trust me, all your tears now will be happy smiles in future. All your pains will be only happiness in future. All your loneliness will be only togetherness in future!

Thanks to Priyas_diary my pangu💖🔥 Published this as she insisted me to! And she gave me the courage to publish it.

With love
Sruthi💗