Just A Sad Love Story

Hurting

When i was 13 a boy with big blue eyes stole my heart, the thing is he never gave it back. And I don't want it back.
They say the one you love is the first one you think of when you wake up and the last one you think of before you fall asleep. I find this to be the truest thing ever said. Its the very truth that haunts my dreams. Its the darkness in the back of my mind, hanging on my every word.
I'll never love another the way I love him. Its the kind of love mothers beg their daughters to avoid. The kind of love that keeps you up at night wondering what could have been. The kind that eats away at your heart leaving a gaping hole you cant quite fill, its the bitterness in your voice on a bad day. Its the kind that will kill you in the end.
Love, its a beautiful killer. We fall in love so easy, never asking why. I was so young. All I wanted was to be loved. Im still so young. I'll be 17 next month and i've aged a life time.
I've fallen in the worst kind of love. It doesnt matter what he does to me, i'll always run back to him. A boy with a heart-stopping smile broke my heart with a kiss. My life ended the day I met him. A forbidden love holds my heart in chains, bound for a life time to a ruthless lover.
I can like whoever I want. I could date a million other guys. It doesnt matter. At the end of the day my heart still hurts. My mind will always go back to him. I'll be married with kids. I'll have a nice house in a nice town. And i'll love my husband. But late at night when im laying in bed wide awake my heart will still feel the sting of the pain. And my mind will wonder back to the boy with big blue eyes. As fresh tears stain my cheeks i'll wonder where he is now. I'll wonder how his life turned out, if he ever married, who he became. But most of all i'll wonder if he remembers my name, if he's gazing at the same night sky wondering the same things about me.
I see it as it is. We're doomed to be star crossed lovers for as long as we both shall live. And i'll be forced to always wonder what could of been. Till the day i die my heart shall forever belong to him. When I close my eyes i'll see those shinning blue ones starring back at me. Forever bound to a forbidden love my heart wont love another the same way again. Tristan will be the name on my last breath