sent by anonymous user Raindrops and Snow (this will will sound more poetic)
If I had wings, I'd fly somewhere where the truth couldn't catch me.
Perhaps a place where I could admire Earth from a distance while living in blissful ignorance, free and unburdened. I wouldn't have to keep trying to catch up with the unspoken expectations of society that constantly eluded me - and outcasted me, if I was too slow to catch on.
Life is a game, and only some know the rules. Some called me strange; some called me a dreamer. I was too naïve to see the distaste behind the predatory smiles, too trusting to realise that who had seemed to be my closest friend was simply taking advantage of me.
Since, I have matured, though at times I wish I hadn't. Being young and oblivious was easier－ back then, I hadn't been aware of the true intent of those who seemed so nice. Because, as I have now come to realise, our actions are based off personal gain, not genuine kindness. Everything is done for a reason - and the reason can be good or bad.
I have different masks for different days, different personalities for different people. They say I'm a people-pleaser, but if only they knew the extent of it. 'Be yourself,' they tell me, but how can I drop the mask when the only time I've tried, I've ended up losing a friend? My only refuge are books, where I can become absorbed in a world so perfect that I can pretend my troubles don't exist.
But not everything is horrible and unfair. Sometimes the smallest things give me a reason to keep going, to march onwards, because their exquisite beauty compels me. A raindrop, shattering into glittering prisms of light as it splashes onto the ground. The last dying rays of sun forming gold pools at my feet as it sinks beneath the horizon. The light refracting of fa rainbow on a cool, rainy day.
I may be autistic. I may be a dreamer. I may be confused, timid, and lost. But I've come tolerant that nobody is perfect, and in this world of twisted fantasies and possibilities, paradise does exist. So if I had wings, maybe I'd stay right here - and perhaps, everything will turnout alright.
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