oneshots

it won't hurt (nct jaemin x reader)

tw: mentions of self harm, anxiety disorder and eating disorder

"NO I DON'T WANNA GO," they yelled but it came out as a mere whimper. "You are being an absolute brat y/n. Do you want me to go up there and slap you?" screamed an older woman standing by the doorway.

That was it. They flinched at their mother's words. Tears started to stream down their cheeks as their palm clutched onto the bedsheets.

After a string of not so colourful words left their mother's mouth, she gave one last disgusted glare and left the room, banging the door loudly against it's frame on the way out.

They fell back onto their bed and cried their eyes out. Their mind was clouded with thoughts of the hospital and syringes. Their mother's angry monologue kept ringing in their ears.

They didn't know how long they had been crying for until a gentle knock on the door interrupted their trance. "I'm coming in, angel," spoke a soft male voice.

They didn't bother peaking from underneath their sheets to know it was their best friend, Na Jaemin.

The bed dipped as he sat right next to their sleeping figure, palm resting against their stomach. He made gentle circles with his hand across their tummy, trying to soothe their choking sobs.

It didn't take him long to realize that his best friend had become non-verbal, and would refuse to talk for a while.

He used his fingers to slowly pull the fluffy blanket away from their face only to see them fast asleep with tear stained cheeks.

About 25 minutes later, a hand tapped onto their thigh and the warmth of a breath fanned against their left ear. "Angel? Wake up baby, we are here."

They opened their eyes and blinked a few times to adjust to the lighting. The clock on the dashboard read 8:13 am.

Their neck snapped towards the window to see a white building with the name of a diagnostic laboratory affixed at the top in bold.

They immediately shook their hand and frantically grabbed onto his arms. Their desperate eyes were enough to tell anyone how much they were dreading this.

"I'll be right here next to you, I promise. It won't hurt, you won't feel a thing. Please honey, you know this is important," he tried his best to reassure them.

They let their body slouch against the passenger seat, eyes darting back and forth as if they were contemplating what to do in this situation. Slowly they nodded.

"Very good! I promise I'll be there, hmm?" he said looking at them for a response. He only got a tightening grip around his wrist as an answer.

He unbuckled both their seatbelts and led them out if the car. He intertwined their fingers and pulled them close as they walked into the building.

The cool air from the air-conditioner, the bright lights from the ceiling and the sterile smell of alcohol and multiple drugs hit them like a truck.

They subconsciously moved closer and gripped onto his arm as they were lead to a cabin so the nurse could draw their blood.

The sight of the sharp needle of the syringe was enough for them to burst. The environment they were in induced an anxiety attack. Their breathing became unstable and tears started to stream down their cheeks.

Jaemin immediately noticed this and pulled them into his chest. "Shhh angel, it's okay, Nana is here with you," he hushed them.

He sat on the chair and pulled them into his lap. Their knuckles went white as they clung onto his mint hoodie, head buried deep in the crook of his neck.

You see the reason why they were so terrified is because of a bad past with this sort of thing. They used to self harm when they were younger and were admitted to the mental hospital for it before.

Although they were clean for about a year now, the sight of sharp objects sent a chill down their spine. Also the worry of getting horrific results from the blood test just like they used to when they battled from their eating disorder was bugging them.

Lately their mental health had been on the edge of worsening and they were having urges of running the blade across their arms again. So the sight of blood and a needle was making them queasy.

The incident of them fainting once while getting their blood drawn flashed before their eyes. The fear made them shake in his lap.

No one understood why they were resisting getting a blood test done so much. No one but Na Jaemin. Jaemin always knew. He didn't need words, he just knew.

He nodded at the nurse to tighten the strap around their bicep. Muffled sniffles raked out of their mouth. "Shh angel, I'm here. It won't hurt. I promise," he whispered against their ear.

The needle head pressed against their skin and pierced through the flesh. An inaudible scream was muffled by the mint hoodie as they bit onto the fabric.

The nurse waited for a while, trying to get the blood to enter into the tube. They were a very frail and skinny person. It always took extra long to draw their blood.

About 30 seconds later, the sharp object was pulled out of their arm and was replaced with a bandage.

"You did so so good baby. I'm proud of you," he spoke in admiration as he pressed a kiss to their forehead. His strong arms went to their thighs and lifted them up into his arms.

He walked them back to the car and got into the driver's seat. He let his best friend lay on his chest and cry it out. He kept whispering words of appreciation and rubbing small circles in their back.

Life made them do the most horrible things, and many people always mocked them for it. But it won't hurt as long as Na Jaemin was there.