Chasing him

Part 1- Hard Realization

Tired
Jian Yi was just tired of chasing him, he loves him so much but it's hard getting constant rejection. Although he hasn't confessed yet, it's really clear how much he loves his best friend and he has shown it that much that all of his friends and classmates know. Nonetheless, Zhan Xi chooses to ignore it or even worse reject his attempts to pursue him. This was painful for Jian Yi, he felt like he deserved more, of course he wasn't the best person in the world but he wasn't so bad either. He knew that his friend loved him but not in the way he did, he just saw him as a friend and nothing more and that will always stay the same, but of course that doesn't stop Jian Yi from loving him. Lately it's getting hard to continue, sometimes he gets his hopes up but that doesn't last long and the cycle repeats. That rollercoaster of emotions have brought his mood down every night, crying himself to sleep and keeping up his emotions locked the next day while attempting to make his friend fall in love.
One day at school
Jian Yi was looking for Zheng Xi, searching for him in every hallway and checking with his classmates if they knew where he went while he was in the restroom but he was nowhere to be found. He guessed he was doing something for the teacher again since it's something his kind but serious friend would do, so he decided to go lie down next to a tree after that exhausting search. After getting comfortable next to a nice tree giving plenty of shade to protect him in that hot day they were having, he heard people talking near him. As his little curious self started to get aware of the sounds surrounding him, he realized one of the voices talking was the one of his beloved Zheng Xi. He almost went straight up to them to hug XiXi cause he missed him a lot, but he opted not to after he heard his name being said by an unknown female voice. He started getting close to them to hear the conversation they were having, maybe his beloved friend was planning a surprise for him. After hiding next to a spot where he could hear them clearly he stayed quiet and listened:
Girl: I still don't understand! Why won't you go out with me??
Xi: I already explained you, I don't know you.
Girl: Are you seriously gonna reject me all because of that little friend of yours!? That Jian Yi???
Xi: listen here, it's not that, I know it's obvious that he has feelings for me , but I just don't see him that way! Why does everyone misunderstand this!? We made promises but that's all we are just friends, and that doesn't change the fact that I don't know you, I'm not going out with you, and I know he will get upset and annoy me for it.

Jian Yi was shocked, of course he knew there were people who liked his best friend but he didn't expect his best friend to be talking like that let alone rejecting him straight up although he didn't knew he was there. He had a lot of mixed feelings after hearing all this, some were confusion, some were sadness, some were anger, of course his friend knew he liked him but why talking that way about him, as if he wouldn't respect his relationships if he was in one, or using our promise once again in this kind of situation, it makes him think that his friend is burdened their by promises. Although what Zheng Xi wasn't necessarily bad, every word resonated in Yi's mind.
The bell rang and students went back to their classrooms, but Yi preferred to calm down and think about his situation since he wasn't feeling the best. Even though skipping one class was helpful enough to calm him down his thoughts didn't stop, but in the end he decided to go back to class and act normal. Although he wasn't talking as much as usual, no one noticed, not even his best friend  which didn't make him felt any better
School eventually ended and Ji  went straight home , and he didn't even feel like saying his goodbyes to Xixi.
At home Yi was a mess, we was thinking and thinking worse than any other night before, he hated how he felt he hated how much he loved him and hated even more how he can't stop loving him but enough is enough he wants ti start loving himself more and waste less time in love, he ended in the hard realization that his love will never be corresponded and that was fine, he always knew it deep down.