please read

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Hey everyone, I have some stuff to share.
After I finished faking it, I really don't know what happened but something inside me just switched off. I was brain dead with ideas, and even when I had one, my motivation to write it was so low I couldn't even open the app without feeling a little bored. At first I believed it was a phase, and that eventually the fire would come back. I waited, and waited, and waited and waited and waited and you get the point. I made the story "rewrite" and forced myself into writing chapters, publishing them, and I waited even more. Not an ounce of motivation came back. So I deleted the story.

Next... I'll admit... I started to loose feeling for Louis. Not because of anything he did, I mean he's still such an amazing person. I just was losing my fire for him too. And that isn't exactly helpful when my entire page is fanfics of him. Because now I have 2 thousand people following me, of which most are here for Louis, and I don't even wanna write about him anymore. So this feeling also contributed to my lack of motivation. I think when you're totally crushing on a guy it's common to want to create scenarios with him :) and that's exactly what past me did.

Later, I attempted to start writing "always and forever" in my drafts first to see if that would help at all. I thought maybe if I just wrote a regular romance, with no one in picture at all, it would fix it. Nope. Still, here I was with not a drop of determination. Which is why, as you may have noticed, I deleted "always and forever" as well.

So unfortunately, my time on wattpad is coming to and end. I will not be creating any further stories. I understand that to some this news is nothing, because I'm just one of the many accounts they follow, but I also know that to some, this news might be upsetting.

I've had my page for over a year, creating relationships with wonderful people from all over. People that have supported me, people that have given me ideas and commented on all my stories. They helped me keep going. And I'm so sorry if that's one of you. I don't mean to make you upset if I leave.

The truth is, I don't know what's going on. I don't know why I can't get myself to write. But it's not happening. I've been so frustrated with myself because I don't wanna let anyone down. I've been draining myself trying to write and it's starting to feel like more of a chore than an extra hobby. Which again, is not anyones fault. I remember at first, I'd post like 5 times a day and I made stories in less than a month. I mean I'd get home from school and write for so long because I never ran out of ideas. And I miss my love for it so much. I wish I could do that again but it's just not working.

For two weeks I thought about ghosting you all. Horrible, I know. I thought if I just left, it would all die out. But clearly, because you're reading this, I came back. It didn't seem fair to leave you guys in the blue like that, and I'm sorry.

To finish off, I won't be deleting the account. Just logging off. So my stories will still be available to read, there just won't be new ones.

If some day by miracle I get my fire for writing back (which I REALLY hope I do because I miss it) I'll totally log back on and write for you again. But for now, this is a farewell.

Thank you for supporting me, thank you for encouraging me, and thank you so much for understanding.

I love each and every one of you, and I'm so, so sorry

-kpara27