why would you like him better? [ENG] | gin x higuchi

one

gins pov

it's a random monday night. chuuya invited some people from mafia to drink something. in total: koyō, tachihara, ryu "aka akutagawa", mori, hirotsu, higuchi and me, of course.
everyone is drinking wine. Chuuya recommended and we decided to try it.
Koyō is talking to Mori and Hirotsu, chuuya and tachihara are telling random stories about their lifes and laughing, while ryu is quiet, sometimes being pushed into the conversation by chuuya.
But I don't really know, I'm trying to presume by the voices and by my
peripheral vision, but the true is that higuchi looks amazing tonight.
Basically everyone came with their daily clothes, but even if so, higuchi looks stunning. Her beautiful blonde hair is down and so bright. she's smiling as she talks to me, and also looking a little embarrassed, i wonder why.
I can't stop looking at her.
It's still a new thing, but as the days pass, I know even more how in love i am with her.
I have never told anyone about that, but one day, as I was watching higuchi go away to work, koyō was walking by my back and told me – she's a good girl. but be aware with your feelings. Im sure you don't want to be disappointed by hers, do you? – and walked away.
She probably already know, but what would I do? I can't deny it.
As I think, she starts to looks nervous.
I'm sorry, was she talking about something bad that happened and I didn't even answer?
"Is everything okay? "
I say.
She looks shocked but soon try to mask her nervousness and puts her hair behind her ear as trying to get calm.
she takes a breath.
"Gin... I can be an idiot by asking this to you but, how can i make your brother like me? "
My heart drops.
She likes him?
It's totally normal to ask such thing to a friend, even more if it is about the friends brother.
How could i think it was a mutual feeling?
I'm frozen, I can't let her think anything in the lines of "she's mad" or "I shouldn't have said that".
A part of me says she really shouldn't, but still, it is easier to accept now then some weeks or months later, when I would definitely be ready to be in a real relationship with her.
"oh, well, he doesn't really like people who try to much, maybe you should just talk to him in a comfortable moment and when you know how to maintain the topic?"
I try to stay as stable as ever, even with such a bad feeling inside me.
I love her so much and want her to be happy, but thinking on seeing her with my brother hurts me deeply.
This is definitely not a random Monday night anymore.

(please tell me if I should end it like this or make a continuation!)