Flowers that symbolizes and reminded his love. (woozi hanahaki one-shot)

1.

The petals made their way through his throat, Blocking his air-way, screaming at him to let them out. He swallows his saliva, A desperate attempt to stop the petals from pushing through. He knew it wouldn't work. It was useless. But, He was desperate and didn't want to vomit right now - They were in practice.

He immediately grabbed his water bottle, Drinking a lot. He wiped his mouth, Putting the water bottle down. "hey, Slow down! You might vomit later." A familiar voice rang through Jihoon's ears, His attention shifting to the male. 'But I already feel like vomiting anyway.

Hoshi sat down next to him. Jihoon heard him talking, But it was muffled. The voices around him were muffled, Mixing with each other, Getting louder and louder as he felt the petals rise yet again. There was ringing in his ear, And his head hurt - more and more as every second went by. He felt the pain forming in his chest, Getting greater and greater, And Jihoon could swear he might've cried at the pain.

"B-Bathroom.." was the only thing he could mutter before sprinting to the bathroom.

He opened the door, Locking it behind him.

His legs were wobbly, Causing him to grip the sink with full force as he retched the petals for support.

Pathetic.

Jihoon felt pathetic when this would happen. He felt oh so so so weak.

It felt like it was never gonna end.

The petals kept on coming out.

The pain kept on stabbing him.

The tears wouldn't stop spilling.

And after what if felt like forever, It stopped.

He sighed relieved, The pain beginning to subside.

He gazed at the petals, Feeling more tears threatening to spill from the corner of his eyes. The flower petals, Stained with blood. yet why did they still look beautiful, Making Woozi almost think it's just a normal harmless flower - When in reality it's what makes him the most vulnerable and weak?

He hated how much pain he felt when he coughed them.

Jihoon hated how it reminded him of him.

He hated it.

But the more he stares at the flowers - The more that he thinks they're so beautiful.

It symbolizes his love after all.

He sighed, Shaking the thoughts away and began to clean the petals with the bathroom toilet paper.

He delicately cleaned it - as if it was so fragile, And it hadn't made him feel pain.

He then finished and went out, Met with worried voices - that made him feel happy even just a little.

just a little.

just a moment.

Happiness, do you think I'll ever truly find it?

It's just for one moment and then all darkness comes over and makes everything worse.

Oh how much I want this to end.

.....

He sighed plopping into the couch, Along with the other members.

Today was tiring, Dancing wasn't really Jihoon's forte, Which made him tired. aside from the part he vomited endlessly.

"what movie should we watch?" Dino asked, Excited for their Friday movie night. At Friday, They would always watch a movie as to congratulate for making through this whole week. but he can feel that anytime now he might just drop dead and not make it anymore.

"Maybe we should watch the new movie called 'flowers'?" Mingyu answered the latter, And jihoon could feel his stomach going sick just by hearing that word.

"What's it about?" The leader questioned, Quite entranced by the name of the movie. All of them look at him confused, As if they're also curios. "It's about a fictional disease called hanahaki, They said one contracts it when they are a victim of a one-sided love, So they will cough flowers because it symbolizes their love." He answered.

Jihoon widened his eyes, Pursing his lips. oh god not that pleasenoIwontbeabletobareit-

"That's interesting. Let's watch it, I want some angst" S.cups replied, Nodding, meaning he can play that movie.

Jihoon took a deep breathe, Maybe he'll find more about the disease? Maybe he can find a way to cure it?

The movie then starts, The screen fading into a girl vomiting at the restroom. Piles of flowers, Blood tainting the seemingly innocent petals.

oh god..

The scene was familiar to Jihoon, And he could feel like he could vomit too.

"Oh goodness- I didn't think it would be that gruesome.."

"but it's sad though.."

The members commented, But Jihoon couldn't recognize whose voice it was, Due to his mind getting fuzzy once again, He could feel the flower petals building up again. He sighs, swallowing saliva - a desperate attempt once again.

The movie proceeds, Playing the events one by one.

She fell in love with her best friend.

He didn't love her back.

He loved somebody else,

and she was sure of it.

She searched up how to get rid of it, Showing the results.

You can only get cured once you die, Or your feelings get reciprocated in a romantic way, Friendship isn't enough. Or you could remove it surgically, But your feelings for that person will be removed.

but she chose to suffer instead, Not wanting to get her feelings removed for him.

The room was filled with sniffles, some saying she's such an idiot and that guy doesn't deserve her, So why could she be still be so stubborn.

But they don't know. Only Jihoon knew how hard it was. He related with her on everything, He also felt the same thing about the surgical method.

They don't know how hard it is to let go of the only person you love. Even if it killed you.

The movie's ending was quite sweet, She found another person who loved her, And she was alright again.

If only it was also that easy to have a happy ending.

The truth is, Even if somebody truly loves you, You can't let go of the person you loved first.

That's what love is, And it was bittersweet.

"Goodness- I'm so grateful nobody actually experiences that!" Dino then commented, They laughed afterwards. But Jihoon was left their, Not knowing how to respond to that.

I'm right here, I actually experience that. whycantyouguysseeithurtssomuchohgod-

And the next thing he knew, He was on the floor. Gasping for air. Vomiting. Muffled voices, His sight blurry. His back was getting patted, And he didn't know what's happening.

To be honest.

I'm scared.

I'm scared to lose my feelings for him, Cause his love keeps me alive but at the same time kills me.

I'm scared to let go of him.

I'm scared.

I'm scared of everything.

But I'm not scared of only one thing though.

Dying for him.

~Fin~