Darkness

Prologue

"Do I really deserve this?" I said to myself, crying. Isolated in the four corner of my room. Ang dilim, mag isa nanaman ako. I can't stop crying even if I want to. I feel like there's a big hole in my heart, Sobrang nasasaktan ako. What did I ever do to deserve this?! I can't stop questioning my worth everyday. I badly wanted to just die because I'm already dead inside. I've been crying for hours now, I don't know what to do.

"What the hell happen to you?" Audrey said. She was my bestfriend, I feel like she's the only person who can understand me but even her can't make me feel better. We've been bestfriend for 3 years now and I am grateful to have a friend like her.

Tumingin ako sa mga mata niya, she looks so worried. I can't stop crying. I can't! "Alyna listen to me, okay? Please stop crying, I'm begging you" she hugged me. "Shushh. It's okay! I'm here for you, shushh" she hugged me and that comforted me.

She stayed with me until sunrise. Nakaabala pa ako.

"I'm sorry" Sabi ko pagkalabas ko ng kwarto. She's in the kitchen I can smell something maybe she's cooking.

She then looked at me. "Why so sorry? Are you okay now? Kung sasabihan mo lang ako ng sorry dahil inaabala mo ako. Umupo ka nalang dito. Halika, I cooked breakfast for you" she then guided me to take a seat.

"How did you know? Why did you come here? You should go home last night baka hinahanap kana nila tita" Sunod sunod na tanong ko.

"All I want to here from you is 'thankyou'! Are you seriously asking me that? Bestfriend mo ako kaya alam ko lahat ng baho mo." She said while putting some rice and bacon on my plate. " tska I already told mommy Na hindi ako uuwi dahil I'm staying here for one week. Uuwi ako mamaya kukuha ako ng mga damit ko, okay ba?"

I don't want to talk because I feel like It will just drain me so I started eating. Hindi niya narin ako kinausap dahil alam niyang wala naman akong masasabi dahil nga hindi ako okay.

Papasok ba ako? Hindi ko alam hays. Magagalit nanaman sakin ang Prof ko, may presentation pa naman dapat sana ako. Ah bahala na.

"Papasok ako, ikaw ba?" Tanong ko sa kanya habang naghuhugas siya ng pinagkainan.

"Oo naman."

I sighed. A long day for me.

______________________

I kept myself busy at school to avoid overthinking. Even when I'm at home, I need to be busy so that I wouldn't cry again. I'm the worst. Sleeping isn't a rest for me, it's just part of my life. Even if I sleep whole day i'm still tired. This is exhausting. Napapagod na akong mabuhay but I need to be strong for my family.

We aren't that rich that's why I need to work hard and earn a lot of money.

"Love" it's my boyfriend, lorenz. He kissed my cheeks and gave me a hug.

"Hi" I faked a smile.

"Are you okay? You look so pale, is something bothering you?" He asked me.

"Yeah. Okay lang ako don't worry" I said then laughed.

"Are you hungry? Let's eat, what do you want? It's my treat!" He said. I can see that he's happy.

"Anything" I said. I don't know what to say. I don't have an appetite. I feel Like throwing up but I managed to look okay in front of him. Until when should I pretend that I am okay? Does he have a Clue? I mean, doesn't he notice it? I don't know.

"Let's just get your favorite chicken Nuggets, okay?" He asked me, I nodded.

We went to Mcdonalds. We usually eat in fastfood restaurants because it't convenient and affordable. We're still a student so we don't have that much to spend.

After we ate, he took me home. I already told him that Audrey will be staying with me for a week.

"Why?" He asked.

"I don't know maybe she's bored in their house"

"That's great. Atleast you have someone to accompany you"

"Hmm"

"We're here. See you tomorrow" he said when we arrive at my condo.

"Okay see you. Ingat ka." He kissed my forehead before leaving.

Leaving. He left me. Alone. I'm alone again.

Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of my imagination. Any resemblance to any actual person, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

I am hoping you enjoy reading. I'm not a professional, I just write because I feel like I want to. I am not good in English so pls understand me. Thankyou!.