https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nnSGuzNmg0wgQuQ0299GI5iw4thg7lvTQBCDRAoZ8as/edit?usp=sharing
Chris: "Last time on Total Drama Island... The competitors were forced to conquer their deepest, darkest fears. Not all of them succeeded, but others surprised the group and faced their fears head-on. In a shocking twist, Tyler let the Bass down when he was too chicken to face the chicken. Get it? [laughs] And it was "Buh-Bye, Tyler." Once again, the Bass find themselves behind. Can they pull this one out of the water? Find out today on Total. Drama. Island!"
~~Theme song ~
Chris: "Bass, Gophers, today's challenge is a true summer camp experience. A canoe trip. You'll be paddling your canoes across the lake... [spookily] to Boney Island! When you get there, you must portage your canoes to the other side of the island, which is about a two-hour hike through treacherous, dense jungle."
Geoff: "We've gotta pour what?"
Chris: "Portage."
[fly buzzes]
Chris: "Dude, walk with your canoe."
Geoff: "Oh."
Chris: "When you arrive at the other end of the island, you'll build a rescue fire that will be judged by me. The first team to paddle home and return their canoes to the beach is the winner of invincibility! Move, campers, move! Oh, wait! One more thing I should mention. Legend has it, if you take anything off the island, [spooky voice] you'll be cursed forever!"
Thunder.
Owen: "Yeah, haha! A cursed island! Whoo!"
Chris: "Now, get in your canoes, and let's have some fun!"
Owen: "Yes!"
A toilet flushes.
Beth: "What'd I miss?"
Chris: "Canoes."
~Confessionals~
Cody: Chris told us to pick a paddling partner. It was time for me to make my move. If I could just get Gwen alone for five minutes, I knew I could woo her with my manly charms.
Lovely guitar music.
~Confessionals~
Cody: "Come on, Gwen! You and me, open water! What do you say?"
Crack.
Lindsay: "Trent! You have to come with us!"
Cody is grunting.
Gwen: [sighs] "Fine. But I'm in charge."
Cody: 'That's the way I like it."
~Confessional~
Cody: Yes! Yes! Yes! It is so on! [plays air guitar]
*STATIC*
Gwen: Cody? He's like an annoying brother. A really annoying little brother.
*STATIC*
Cody is playing the air guitar.
*STATIC*
Gwen: So much for hooking up with Trent.
~Confessional~
Izzy: [grunting] "Just follow my technique. I'm one-eighty-seventh Cherokee, you know? Which means, like, the tribe could totally, like, claim me at any time."
