Little Lady

Chapter 10

(A/N- Sorry, I couldn't update for a while, my bad. ~Emma)

***Amanda-

I know that right now you might still be angry at me, but please know that I didn't want to do this, but I had to. For you, so that we could still be together soon. If you ever loose hope, know that I'm still here for you. I'm sorry you have to go through this. I love you so much Amanda.

Love,

Ed***

***Ed's POV***

Right after I left Amanda and she turned her back I sprinted to my car and bursted into tears the moment I sat down and closed the door. I tried to stay emotionless on the outside so Amanda wouldn't think I'm weak, but I couldn't hold up myself now.

I let the tears spill out of my eyes for a minute then dried them up and started the car. I wanted to have a silent car ride so i could get my thoughts figured out but right as my hand reached for the radio volume nob, Come Together by The Beatles came on. I pulled myself back, knowing that this song always made me forget everything around me. I sung out the words as strong as I could without tearing up or cracking my voice.

I kept the same routine for the whole ride home, never stopping my singing for anything but a quick catch of my breath. When I got into the driveway I sat there for a few minutes thinking through what I would tell my parents about Amanda's sudden disappearance.

After a couple minutes of thinking it through and double checking that it doesn't look like I've been crying, I got out of the car and went inside. I checked my phone real quick and saw that it was already 4:30pm, I had been gone for a while now so I expected to be dogged with questions right when I walked through the door.

I was right.

The second I stepped foot in the house and yelled that I was home, mum came around the corner with dad following behind a bit.

"So how was-" mum stopped when she saw that I didn't have Amanda with me and I shut the door. "Ed, where's Amanda?" mum questioned.

"Oh yeah a-about that, she found someone to stay with that she's closer related to so I-I brought her over there." I said while stuttering a bit.

"Alright, but why didn't you call us or come back to get her things?" mum demanded an answer.

"Uh, m-my phone died so, uh I couldnt call, and uh, I didn't want to waste gas." I ended making it sound more like a question than a statement.

"Okay then. Well dinner will be on in a half hour so go freshen up, you look like you got mugged." Mum cheerfully switched moods.

"That would've been better..." I muttered to myself while walking up the stairs.

"What was that?" Mum asked from the hallway.

"Nothing!" I yelled back, continuing up the stairs and into my room.

When I got in my room I grabbed my little guitar from its stand in the corner of my room and sat on the edge of my bed. I started strumming a bit and trying to tune it. I did the tuning song along with it until I got it just right. When I got it all figured out, I started to play along to some random songs and sung along to them until I got a beat in my head. I stopped what I was doing and just beat the guitar with my right hand. I continued the beat with my foot on the floor and brought my hand to the strings and strummed the first few chords that were in my head. I repeated that a few times and added some of my thoughts and feelings about Amanda to it. I was just about to write all of it down when mum yelled for dinner. Had it already been a half hour? Wow, I can sure make time fly by.

I walked downstairs to see mum and dad sitting next to each other at the table, which was filled with things from mashed potatoes to some kind of casserole in the middle.

"Smells delicious mum," I cheered.

"Thanks Ed. Now sit," she motioned at the chair in a serious tone.

I sat at a seat across from mum, missing Amanda's presence. I grabbed a plate from the stack and filled my plate up as much as I could. Mum and dad did the same and then bowed their heads and grabbed each others hands. I mirrored their actions and mum spoke.

"Lord we thank you for this beautiful meal and we hope that you keep our Amanda safe in the present and forever. Amen." Mum finished with each of us sharing the last word.

We ate in complete silence, other than the sound of cutlery hitting the plates. After we were done I grabbed the plates and soon cleared the table of its dishes.I walked over to the kitchen and heard my parents talking then walking away and talking more. I ignored it and started up the tap with warm water an put the plates and silverware into the sink. I scrubbed all of the dishes and set them all in the washer and started it. I turned around to see mum and dad in the living room sitting on their couch so I went over and sat with them. They were watching The X-Factor, which i liked, so why not?

After they cut to commercial mum looked over to me, but I tried to look like I was into an ad for Clorox. I looked over slowly and mum was still staring at me.

"What?" I asked her, trying not to sound douchey.

"Ed, do you really think we believe that Amanda suddenly found relatives in a day? We know you Ed, and your stutter only comes back when your lying." Mum said.

"I uhh, yeah I guess I did stutter a bit..." I trailed off.

"Ed, where is Amanda?" She asked in a stern tone. I huffed out a short breath and breathed in a bit and spoke.

"She's at a rehab center in North London." I said in a single exhale, looking away from my parents and back to the telly.

"WHAT?? What for?!" mum screeched.

"Mum, calm down. Amanda has been having problems since being with her uncle. She has an eating disorder and has been doing heroin for quite some time now." I calmly said then facing my now gob smacked parents.

"Oh my," my mom whispered to herself,

After a moment of silence mum spoke again, "Well, can we go and see her?"

"Not for another week," I spoke, trying to hide my evident sadness.

"Alright, do you know when she'll get to come home?" She asked sounding sympathetic.

"After a couple weeks they'll check to see if she's stable enough but if she isn then they'll go week by week." I finished remembering that I have limited time to see her now. I started to feel sick not knowing what she might be going through without me.

"Okay, are you alright Ed? You don't look so good..." Mum asked me with a worried tone.

"Yeah, I think I just need some sleep..." I drifted of while walking away and promptly upstairs to my room.

I shut the door and slid down with my back facing the door. I put my head in my hands and rested my elbows on each of my knees. I closed my eyes but I had to take a couple minutes of deep breaths before I released my hair from my hands and hit my head back on the door. I took a deep sigh and stood up. I walked over to my bed, sat down and grabbed my guitar then set it in my lap. I started strumming some random chords again and grabbed my capo and clipped it to the second fret. I strummed for a bit and then decided to continue on the song I was doing earlier. All of my thoughts were clear for just a moment and then the song came back to me. I remembered each note and every word from before and sung it out a couple times. After I was done I grabbed my notebook and pencil from my bedside table and wrote every detail down. I wrote the date at the top of the page and at the bottom I wrote down a little note.

For Amanda; The day I let you go into the hands of other people, it was the hardest decision of my life. I know you'll change your dirty ways, but you will always remain your own. You will always be my Amanda, the one I fell in love with the first time I saw you.