Who am I? (Jeff the killer)

Chapter 21

Iris pov

I got home around 10:00 am. My mom saw me and hugged me. It was so awkward since I haven't seen her in forever. "Your going to school tomorrow Iris." I sighed and nodded.

I went into my room. It's been a while. I was picking out what is was gonna wear tomorrow. Black skinny jeans, mayday parade shirt, black jacket, and black vans. Im really nervous. I feel like I'm gonna have many panic attacks tomorrow.

It was 11:45 pm and I was still awake in bed. I turned on my lava lamp and turned on some music. I heard a knock on my window. It was jeff. I smiled to see him again.

I missed him. I let him on and he hugged me really tight. He kissed me on the cheek and we sat down on my bed. "I missed you Iris." He looked down to hold my hand. "I missed you to" he smiled.

Are lips collided and finally everything felt better and my anxiety went away. He put his hands on my waist. We started to laugh a little. We layed down and cuddled until he had to go because I needed to sleep.

"GET THE FUCK UP IRIS!!! SCHOOL NOW BITCH!!!!" My mom yelled. I got up and went into my bathroom. God I look like shit. I started to straighten my hair.

After that I put on some makeup with eyeliner mascara. I put on my clothes and went down stairs to make coffee. My mom was in her room so I had time to be alone. I felt hands around my waist.

I turned around to see jeff. I put my arms around his neck and kissed him. I put my hand on his cheek and we gazed into each other's eyes. "I love you." He said. "I love you to jeff."

I gave him a cup of coffee and told him to drink up. I got my cup of coffees and drank them real fast. "Alright I have to go to the bus so I love you and I hope you have a good day!" I hugged him and kissed his cheek.

I walked outside and waited by the bus stop. I started having a small panic attack waiting there. I just stood there. The bus arrived a few moments later.......

The bus driver opened the bus door. I went In there and walked all the way to the back. People were staring at me. I started to shake and break down a little.

A guy came up to. "Hey slut! Your ugly! Why are you staring dick bitch?" He slapped me in the face. 2 other girls started beating me up. I started bleeding on my nose and I got a whole bunch of bruises.

When I got to my first period a whole bunch of kids were being really mean to me and giving me looks. I started breaking down and shaking. I couldn't stop crying. Then some guy hit my boobs and slapped my ass.

Girls were calling me a slut. "God your so fat! Go cut your wrist emo skum bitch! FUCKING KILL YOURSELF WORTHLESS ASS SHIT FACE!!!!!" Everyone was yelling at me. They kept telling me i was a mistake. I was miserable. I wanted to die and cut and lock myself in my room.

The teacher let us have free time so I I put in my head phone and put on the song welcome to my life. (Lyrics to the song)
Do you ever feel like breaking down? Do you ever feel out of place? Like some how you just don't belong and no one understands you? Do you ever wanna run away? Do you lock yourself in your room? With the radio on turned up so loud so no one here's you screaming? No you don't know what it's like, when nothing feels alright you don't know what it's like to be like me.... To be hurt to feel lost to be left out in the dark to be kicked when your down to feel like you've been pushed around to be the on the edge of breaking down and no ones there to save you. No you don't know what it's like. Welcome to my life.

(End of a little bit of the lyrics)

I had my music turned up the loudest it would go. I was just sitting on my desk having my head down hoping no one would notice or care. Some one came up to me and punched me in the nose.

It was lunch time. I sat alone... No one wanted to be near me. Everyone here hated me. No one liked me. I didn't eat. I just drank water. I can't eat either. Im to fat. I went in the bathroom and threw up 5 times. I feel so shitty.

After school was over I went to go on my bus and shut myself out. I put in my headphone and listened to music.

I was walking towards the door cause this was my stop. People kept pushing me to get out. I finally got put and ran home. I texted the guy I use to get ciggerates from. He said he'll give me 10 packs for 20$ which is a really good deal. I had to meet him in the ally so I ran there.

I already had lighters. we finally saw each other. I gave him the 20$ and he gave me the 10 packs. Im back to my old habits. It's been a while. I got home and went to my room. I checked to see if jeff was here or my mom. Good im home alone.

I opened a pack grabbed one, and lit it up. It felt good to get back on these. I hope jeff doesn't find out. This is gonna be hard. Getting into old habits. Im not suppose to be smoking anymore but I just have so much stress right now.

After I finished it, I hid all of them and made sure no one would find them. Im sure jeff won't find out. It's my little secret.