A couple days ago I had a conversation with my mom, and it made me realize how often I say, "I don't know". Whether it comes to my own thoughts, feelings, or emotions. I explain to people how I feel about different situations and always end my complete thought with "I don't know". "I really like him, but I think he just has commitment issues, I don't know.". She let me finish venting and replied with "no, you do know". She knows women's intuition speaks nonverbal volumes. Our thoughts, feelings, and emotions are valid, never minimize your introspection. Read your surroundings and take mental notes, actions will always validate good or bad intentions. Ask questions when actions are unclear, never allow yourself to sit in a state of ponder. Our brains already carry so much weight between irregular days and stressful life situations, why add more to it? And as a message to all women, we know. We know when someone isn't being honest, loyal, or genuine. We can clearly detect when something isn't right. Your intuition is never inaccurate.
The nightmares you have of your significant other that you love dearly doing unimaginable things to the point where you wake up with a heart beating so fast you feel like you ran three marathons? You do know. The days he replies to your good morning texts and suddenly starts to "forget" to say, "I love you too". You do know. The moments where he nonchalantly does things you've previously expressed that bother you. You do know. When he begins to take his phone with him when he gets out of the car to go into the gas station just to buy a Brisk and Backwoods. You do know. When he suddenly starts to salivate over Instagram models without considering that you might flood your thoughts with insecurity. You do know. That night you laughed in his face during an argument, and he wrapped his hands around your throat and blamed it on Vodka making him violent. You do know. The multiple nights you cried yourself to sleep laying right next to him in his bed, and he continued to fall asleep peacefully. You do know. The night you noticed he turned off his location after leaving the club with his friends. You do know. The day you were using his phone to order pizza and saw a text confirmation code from POF. You do know.
When telling your side of the story, always be honest. Allow yourself to hear transparent advice. It's okay to be wrong in some situations, but never end your complete thought with "I don't know". You do know. Your thoughts, feelings, and emotions are valid. Understand them. Follow your soul. Emotional vibrations that feel like earthquakes are accurate. Never doubt them or act like you don't know they exist. Don't be fearful of them. Will Smith once said, "the point of maximum danger is the point of minimum fear." so be dangerous. Step outside of your comfort zone and learn how to control your environments. Skydive into the thought of becoming the best version of you. You are the only person holding yourself back. Take accountability.
xoxo, aj
