Forced I am to crawl, on these bloodied and bruised knees. I see nothing ahead, behind I see the wreckage of my past. I am afraid to move forward. Refuse to go back. Yet still, in spite of my ever present fear I push on! Hoping what never changes will. I still remember the pain of yesters past all to well. I feel the agony like a tilde wave, threatening to swallow me up in its vicious grip. Still I walk, stumble, fall, crawl. Never giving in though my soul screams for rest! All the years of blood and horror still haunt my waking mind. Even what was peace, is now infiltrated by the machinations of terror still churning in my minds eye. I have tried and still failed at many things. I feel as if I am no closer to the end of this pain, as I was when I realized this was not normal. My life nothing but torment! Today, I sit a cauldron of questions and confusion. An adult, yet still a child to the eyes of many. Though I strive to prove the accusations against me false, I feel no victory in my battles. I feel no hope in this lost soul. I am the machine, giving what is needed to those who ask, with no thought of payment in return. I am the wind that hears your pleas, cool and gentle are my words. Or furious and violent. Though my cries are never heard. As the wind does not cry. It is only comforting, or damaging.
I am the darkness at which peace resides for you. You may weep silently, with no worry of another knowing. Yet you know not of the denizens that dwell beside you. They are my weeping tears. Though never seen, never heard. Yes, I am capable of turning on the light and reveal the hideous creature beside you. But I do not...for that would destroy the comfort you have.
I am the sweet tea that revives your spirit through journeys cold. Yet you know not the suffering it required to obtain and crush the leaves of wisdom and strength, that you now enjoy.
I am the cup to catch your tears. Blood or water they flow into the molded cup. Though you know not the long night it took to form the cup.
I ask for nothing in return. Though my soul breaks and crackles in fire untold. Yet I stand through my pain, through my hardship for you. My friend. I shall stand with you as the flames burn away all that you see. If we should die, then it shall be together. I am here for one reason, and that remains true to this day. I see fire blazing in the distance, all I ask is you remember me. Should my family fall, then I shall do the same. Through the valleys high and low I shall travel them with you. I may not have words, but I have a hand. I have an arm to hold my brother. For if the night falls, my brother shall surly die. Though an inferno rages in the wood we travel through, we shall overcome. The mist will clear one day, and on that day we shall live. Even as the sky is filled in fire and smoke, it will yet clear. If need be, we shall watch the forest burn. Desolation hangs like a cloud above the head of my brothers. We will yet survive and thrive. We may see fire burn everything in our known world. But new trees shall sprout from the wretched ground. Just as our hollowed souls will sprout New life. Do not fear, do not fret. My brothers souls shall be watched over....
May all those I deem family, know the joys of life. Even if I do not. I may return as ash in the fire, but I shall always be there. Night may claim me, I hope you remember me, for I will never forget. Even in the next era I am brought to. The fire that claims me may draw near, but I will press through with you. Until my own battle slays me. The night is yet burning, but I am not. And you will not either, even if I fade my spirit will reside kindling within yours
Raise your glass, and be prepared. For I see fire...
