Lost in thought

Thought 1

10:00 pm, I should've gotten my ass to sleep, but like who sleeps now a days? I've been thinking about lots of things, been thinking about how I should've done this or done that, but not like it matters. Hell, I thought about doing this on a whim. What do I even know about writing? But I feel as if I was meant to do this, I felt that something was calling me to do this. I felt that I was meant to put my mind to do something, well other than staring at my damn ceiling. 

But one thing replays in my mind over and over, "what is depression?", Google defines it as "A feeling of despondency and dejection" or "A long and severe recession in an economy or market". Don't mind the second explanation. See as far as I've lived "18 years", people say that they "have depression" or that they're "Depressed" but are they really? Honestly people throw the words Depressed or Depression around so much that now a days people dismiss it. 

Example: 

Bitch 1: "Minor non life threatening thing happened" OMG WHY DID THIS HAPPEN IM SO FUCKING DEPRESSED UGHHH

Me: Bitch what?...

Its like me telling my Filipino mom that I'm sick, and she tells me to just use Vicks instead of getting medication. Point being that something as important as sickness or in this case being depressed, is very often dismissed and instead of helping the people who REALLY suffer from depression, they get thrown either useless things to help cope with depression or they're classified as an attention seeker. Its so fucked that it makes me sick to the core, its the type of sickness that not even Vicks can help with. (Honestly Vicks did help me when I got/get sick).

Me: Mami I'm sick and I don't feel good. "Sniffles"

Mom: Ay nako anak yor always on yor pone tats why yor sick eh, sige pon ka jan ng pon. Oh ito use deh bick baypor rub on ur chest and nos (Omg son, you're always on your phone, thats why you're sick. Here use this Vicks vapor rub on your chest"

Maybe, just maybe instead of people saying "Get over it" to the REAL depressed people, they should just take time out of their damn "busy" lives and take time to have a sit down with their depressed friend or family member. Like is it so much to ask your friends "Oh hey wassup" or "How you doing?". Even if  I do say that, I'm also guilty of not doing that from time to time. But hey its fucking better than just saying "Get over it". 

All the humor aside, depression is a serious thing and not many folks win the battle. Its very saddening, but its the truth. I urge who ever reads this, go talk to your friends or family members, because depressed people are always camouflaged; and if your friend or family does tell you that they're depressed, please don't dismiss it, you never know what'll happen.

Here's to the people who didn't win their battle with depression. Just know that we love you. We all have regrets and we all made mistakes. I hope you do forgive us. Know that if we can turn back time, everything would of have had been different.