poison & wine |detective loki| COMPLETE

BREAKDOWN (blurb)

*set between chapters three and four*

The guilt was eating you alive. 

Sat on the charcoal gray sofa in the living room with sock clad feet tucked underneath you, you could hear the hum of the shower down the hall. The case file was open in your lap, papers littered across the coffee table and behind you in the kitchen, sprinkling your home in sheets of horror and loss.

Your apartment reassembled this case; a mess.

The distant hum of the shower stopped, signaling David was done. Teeth gnawed at the cap of the pen, your eyes never diverting from the form in front of you as you felt Loki place a kiss at the top of your head as he passed behind you on the sofa, the scent of his aftershave lingering in the air.

The cushion next to you dipped under Loki’s weight as he sat next to you, inked fingers gripping at the manilla folder in your lap and pulling it away, flipping it closed on the coffee table.

“You’ve been staring at that for the past two hours.” You could hear the frustration and exhaustion in Loki’s voice. It was only day three.

You sighed heavily, leaning back into the cushion and stretching your neck, eyes slipping closed, “Just trying to find a lead.”

David sighed next to you, fingers trailing up your arm and to your face, fingers gently gripping your chin, “Baby.”

You move to face him, taking notice of the stark difference between the versions of him at work and at home. This Loki was relaxed, well, as relaxed as he possibly could be, able to let his guard down around you and only you, swapping his button collared shirt for a plain white tee and sweatpants. More tattoos were visible in this form, your tired eyes scanning the ink that littered his forearms. His past permanently etched into him for an eternity, never able to escape, only able to hide under the constraints of his clothing. Only here was he unable to hide, the only place he could be open and vulnerable, here with you. 

“Baby.”

Your vacant eyes snapped up to meet his icy blues, “What?”

“Did you hear a word I just said?”

“No.” There was no point in lying or to try to play along, David knew. He always knew.

“I said, you need to take a break. Eat some food.”

You rolled your eyes, turning away from the crippling gaze of his stare, your skin suddenly burning in anger, “I’m fine.”

You stood from the sofa, swaying slightly from the change in position and the lack of nutrition, David’s hand clasping around your wrist as you fought off the dancing black stars across your field of vision.

David stood up next to you, frame towering over yours as he still gently grasped your wrist, “You need to eat something. Last time I saw you ate was a granola bar this morning in the car. We can order-.”

“Don’t you fucking dare say chinese food! Shut the fuck up about food, David!” 

David’s eyes widened at your outburst as he took a step back, “Y/N, you need to eat. You can’t run yourself into the ground.”

Tears stung your eyes as you laughed bitterly, “I said I’m fine. I don’t need you breathing down my fucking neck. This isn’t about her! This isn’t going to bring her back, no matter how much I want it to. She’s dead. Forever.” 

Your weight crumpled underneath you, knees colliding with the hardwood floor into a heap as you sobbed, hiccuping for breath, hands bawling into nothing. You could feel Loki kneel in front of you, arms gathering you up in his embrace and rocking you gently, whispering comforting words in your ear. 

His shirt was crumpled in your hands, knuckles white as you weakly hit his chest, screaming into his neck as you sobbed and begged for relief from the constant pain and torure. Hot tears hit your neck, yours and David’s tears mixing into a lethal cocktail of grief, threatening to burn you alive, your bodies mixing into ash, only then would you be able to be with your daughter again, your family of three reuniting in the soil, crawling home to each other. 

You and David stayed on the floor until the early hours of the morning, David carrying your half asleep form to bed, exhausted from the case and crying. The bed dipped under his weight as he slipped under the sheets next to you, his hand intertwining with yours in a silent prayer that it’d all be okay. It had to be.