This is an edition ripped out of J.K Bowling's rough draft of Harry Potter: And the Slimey Smuffledinks. While digging though JK Bowling's archives I found this gem and wondered why she never published it. So now I am spreading the Rough Draft of Jk...
Harry was wearing the talking hat guy like any day, you get a little something every time. As he was on the roof of the Smufflepuff Compound he looked at the stars like any Hairy would do.
Herobrine was shouting from below
"Hey! Give me my talkin hat govnah!"
Harry was so stunned he forgot to Wongardium Veivosuh his way back out of his trance.
"Mr. Pother, get down from there this instance" said the ringleader boss of the KrumpleDink House
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Ron was in the corner doing something.
Herobrine was dabbing so hard a portal from VoldIsmin came. Voldisman was so angry cuz when Haireay was a teenager he used to smoke from his Hobbit wand in his house by his alley near the apartment. Voldisman would get so furious that he'd sneeze all day until his nose fell off the place into the thjng.
"Hairy my dear boy come my child" Harry said to himself in the voice of a Slithermaine House Boy would do.
Voldisman said
"Ah.
Harey jumped off the building and flipped out his wand so hard.
"Ah Voldisman how do you" do
"Not very well my lover" volesman said with snort of laughter so sadley as if it was maybe sarcastically sounding
Haireye felt a shiver down his spine as Voldermin gentle touched Herobrine on the noggin.
"Ooofff get of me" Hero-brine said almost laughing in pain
"Get off off me you know how it is, oh yeah I know what you're trying to do Voleman I know what you are I know you are a cheating man, you are a man for sure ammi write Roaughn Weasel"
Voldisman looked so stun like he was jaw on the floor. Roaughn Weaselmin was like dabbing so hard at that point that Herobrine was still like doing it wrong. Roaughn Weasel Boy straight up did em dirty when he did the thing to Voledermaine.
"I'm a decedent from you Dad" said the retorting Wron Weezel
"" Voulderman said sarcastically as if he was having the worst day of his life
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Oh yeah that's so right. Feels so right Voldismainer said without a thought of his relatives.
"Without a care in the world Rainman came out from the Ravenfang House.
"I am a Ravenfang so please watch out cuz I may have to sting yah" Herobrine took a big dab and did a backflip off of Vindermans Skull Bones.
"Clink clang boom that's how we do the broom sucker" neeven said from behind Dumbledinks cloak of Masterminding Fortune.
"Grrrr"
Voldisman contemplated his own existence and remembered the time him and Dumbledink used to be friends. Who is a man?
Dumbledink used a pressure point spell to apply some pressure on his victims. And Voldismen and all the Ravenfangs fell on the grasses nole.
Haireys Pottum said oh yeah that more like it.
Ravensbane was so mad at hairy for being alive.
The hat never found it's owner and hair potential grew a whole year forward in time. The eye man with the lazy eye was there with that wood stick smirking as Hairy and the Smuffledinks won the duel. They dueled all the time. Such raskels
The Lazy Eye man gave hairey some wintersbane in exchange for the Bean. Holy bloody hell hariey
The wintersbane was the key in order to trick the Talking Hat Female to change your house into the House of Griffingonk.
"If only I thought of that" somebody said in the distance off in the grassey nole
