Firsts & Lasts

First Realization.

Christian

"Nova, why are we at the fair?" I say. Nova pulls me further into the amusement park full of people and carnival rides. The air smells like funnel cake and it makes my stomach grumble. I haven't been eating as much as I usually do. I didn't know that junior year of college was going to be just as hard as junior year of high school.

"We're here because you've been more moody than usual and you need a fun night out!" She stops walking and stands in front of me. I shove my hands in the pockets of my windbreaker and look around. I look back at her. "You could've taken me to a bar, you know? That's my kind of fun." I say dryly. She rolls her eyes. "Do you trust me?" She says. I look into her brown eyes for a moment to see if she's being serious. "Sure?" It comes out more like a question, but she smiles.

She pulls my hand out of my pocket and tugs me toward the ticket booth. Her eyes linger over the price options. "Uhh, $75 please!" She smiles at the middle-aged woman inside the box. She reaches for her purse as the lady begins to gather our tickets. I pull out a $100 bill from my back pocket a lot quicker than her and place it on the counter.

She frowns, looking back at me. "I invited you out, I should pay." She says and I shake my head, grabbing the tickets and change from the woman. "Thank you," I say to her "don't worry about it," I say to Nova. I pocket the extra bills in my pockets and hand her the tickets. She accepts them and we start walking into the actual fair. "Do you want a beer?" She asks, already walking toward a stand. I nod and she approaches the stand. She orders a beer for me and lemonade for herself.

She hands me the bottle a couple of seconds later and then sips on her straw. "Which ride do you want to get on first? Or do you want to play those games first so we can finish our drinks?" I almost choke on my beer but luckily, I swallow it fast enough. "You want to get on rides?" I ask. She rolls her eyes, "no, Christian. I came to the fair to just walk and stare at other people. Yes, I want to get on the rides!" She hits my arm lightly. This isn't good. I take a swig of my beer.

"Uhm, okay. We'll get on rides then." I say, giving in. Her face lights up and she starts walking towards a ride. It's..huge. I walk slowly and she turns around and mouths hurry up. I hurry my pace and we get in the line which isn't that long. She bounces on her toes impatiently with a smile on her face. "Excited?" I say. She nods, sipping from her straw. I wish I could say the same.

I may or may not have a fear of heights.

The ride is shaped like an anchor and the bottom part carries people. The ride swings up to the left and then goes back down to the right. My stomach drops. How do people find that fun?! It has to go at least 1,000 feet in the air...or am I crazy? I swallow and then look back at Nova. "Are you sure you're not scared?" I say after we just heard the shrieks of multiple people.

She shakes her head. "No, I've been on this ride so many times. It's so fun!" She smiles. Her lemonade is mostly gone by now. My beer is still sort of full. "I don't think I'm gonna finish my beer, so I'll catch the next ride," I tell her, hoping she'll agree. Of course, she doesn't. "Nooo. I'll buy you another beer, you have to come on this one!" She pouts like a little girl and her big, brown eyes do it for me.

I roll my eyes. "Okay fine," I say. Since the line is short, I finish my beer in one swig. I need the liquid courage anyway. I wipe my mouth with my hand and then throw the bottle away in the nearby trash. Nova does the same thing with her cup. Once the ride finishes and people start climbing off, the worker opens up the chain and the line starts moving.

My palms become even more clammy as Novalee becomes more excited. She runs toward the ride and jumps in the seat, pulling the bar down against her chest. "Hurry!" She tells me as I'm barely making my way onto the seat. I sit on the seat easily and pull down the bar. I push it close to my chest about five times to make sure it's secure. I can't believe I'm fucking doing this. A worker comes by all of us to make sure the bars holding us are secure.