The Twelve Disastrous Days Of Christmas

December 18th

Saiki grabbed his shoes, replacing them with his school ones and properly switching them out when Toritsuka approached him.

"Saiki-san! Help me!" yelled Toritsuka, running after him.

'What's wrong? Is someone bothering you? I can help them,' he projected with a smirk.

"You're so quick to be mean to me! What did I ever do to you?"

'Hmm, where do I start? Let me see, I guess the easiest thing to start with is the time you helped my brother try to kill me... Y'know, like the good friend you are-'

"I already said I was sorry! He's creepy! I still don't know how he got me to do it, and- wait, did you call me your friend?"

'What?'

Toritsuka laughed and crossed his arms.

"You did! You called me your friend! Hahaha!"

'Why are you excited? I did not.'

"You can't lie to me, I heard you! And I can ask one of the ghosts for a second opinion if you want," he said, gesturing at the empty air around him.

'Go ahead and ask them, they'll tell you you're crazy.'

"Don't care if it was sarcastic, you still said it! I'm marking it down," he said, pulling out a school notebook, the cover littered with obscene doodles. Not X-rated as he was expecting, but horrible enough to be considered obscene. "I'm writing down, 'Saiki-san has feelings.'"

'I'll burn your notebook to a crisp.'

"I'll frame it and hang it up my wall."

'I'll burn your house to a crisp.'

"That's terrifying!" he yelled, genuinely terrified. "What kind of way is that to treat a friend? And why do you look so happy?"

'Again, never called you that.'

"You did! Stop denying it! You're such a bad friend!"

'Like you're any better.'

"Aha! You said it again! I win!"

'Win what? This isn't a game.'

"I win this argument."

'Who's arguing? And why are you still talking to me?'

"You're right. We shouldn't argue, since we're such good friiiiiiiiiieeeeeeee- Ow! Saiki! What is that?"

'Nothing, I'm very lightly squeezing your head, don't worry-'

"That's not lightly! Ahhh! Stop it!"

Saiki stopped.

"So, Saiki-kun, since we're such good friends, I-"

'Excuse me?'

"Stop being scary! There's only so much I can take in one day! Anyway, I was wondering if you'd help me with a gift idea."

Gift idea? Who's he giving a gift to?

"I got Aiura, and I need your help to-"

'Wait, what do you mean you 'got' Aiura?'

...

"Like, the gift exchange?"

...

"Seriously? We all got-"

'You know what, never mind. I don't care. What do you want from me?'

"Well, what the hell do I get her? I don't even talk to her that often! And I'm pretty sure she hates me, so- "

'It's not like you're helping your case with your nicknames.'

"She calls people by nicknames all the time!"

...

"Alright, alright, fine, I get it... But still, what do you think I should get? I was thinking about-"

'No.'

"Wha-"

'Stop.'

"I don't-"

'Don't do it. Whatever you're thinking of right now, don't do it.'

Toritsuka laughed nervously.

"Well, yeah, not that... It was a quick thought, and there's no way I'll actually get her-"

'Good. That's all the advice you need.'

"What? But I still don't know-"

"Just not that, good grief,' he projected, closing his locker and beginning to walk away.

'Oh! And will the lov-e-ly Kuriko be joining us at the party?'

'Absolutely not.'

...

"Well then, will the lov-e-ly Ku-"

'Don't.'

Neither of me are going.

Oh, how wrong he was.