The Third Black Widow

Family Reunion

I hold Nat and Yelena's hands as we walk. We get to Melina's gate and see her holding a weapon. Oh boy, here we go. I think to myself.

Then we keep walking, and we see her, and she lowers her weapon. She looks at Alexi, then Yelena, then Nat, and then she sees me and looks shocked.

Alexi says, "Honey, we're home." Melina leads us inside and says, "Welcome to my humble abode." Then she walks to her pantry, and a secret passage opens behind the food. It's a weapon storage room. "What are you doing?" asks Nat. "Putting my weapon away," says Melina. I haven't let go of Yelena's hand since we finished walking.

We walk into Melina's kitchen and sit down at the table. Melina and Yelena sit next to each other, facing the window, Nat sits across from Melina, and I sit next to Nat across from Yelena.

Alexi disappeared into the bathroom. Melina has a lot of food on the table. Nat, Yelena, and Melina are talking. I am sitting in my chair, looking around the house.

Then I look at Yelena, and we hear someone clear their throat. We turn around and see Alexi in his Red Guardian suit. "It still fits," says Alexi. Melina whistles. "Oh my God," says Yelena turning away and facing me. Melina is clapping. "I never washed it once. Come and drink," says Melina. I am perfectly fine with my water. Alexi sits down at the head of the table in between Melina and Nat.

Alexi starts singing what I am assuming is his theme song. He finishes and says, "Family. Back together again." "Seeing as our family was just a calculated rule that only lasted three years, I don't think that we can use this term anymore. Can we?" says Melina. "Agreed," says Nat. Oh no, family drama. "So here's what's gonna happen..." starts Nat.

"Okay. Reunion then, huh, and uh. I want to say something right off the bat. You haven't aged a day. Huh, you're just as beautiful, and as supposed to, they stitched our marriage," says Alexi.

While Alexi says that to Melina, Nat, Yelena, and I exchange disgusted looks. As he tells his last sentence, Nat and Yelena drink their alcohol shots, and I take a sip of my water. "You got fat. But still good," says Melina. I let my mind wander for a moment.

"Natasha, don't slouch," says Melina. "I'm not slouching," says Nat. "Yes, you are," says Melina. "I don't slouch," says Nat. In my opinion, Nat has perfect posture. "You're going to get a back hunch," says Melina demonstrating.

I have stopped focusing on family drama. I am now lost in my thoughts about what we're going to do after the reunion, and once all of this is over, what are Yelena and I going to do, and where are we going to go? I'm also daydreamng about a few things I would rather be doing than listening to my family fight.

I am snapped back into reality when Melina says, "Come in!" A pig walks into the room through the front door, and Nat says, "Did that pig just open the door?" "Yes. It did. Good boy, Alexi. Good boy." I look at the floor next to her, and I see a pig.

That must be the Alexi she was talking about. The human Alexi has a look that says, "You have got to be kidding me," on his face.

"You named a pig after me?" asks Alexi in a tone that sounds like Eyeore from Winnie the Pooh. "You don't see the resemblance?" asks Melina. It takes everything in me not to laugh.

"See, he sits just like a dog. Amazing. Now watch," says Melina. Alexi mutters, "Seems weird to me." Melina says, "Stop breathing."

She clicks a button on her iPad. The pig stops breathing. I don't like this at all. I can't focus on anything but the poor pig who has been forced to stop breathing. I can barely hear what Melina says.

I am a huge animal lover, so this breaks me into a million pieces to see. Tears start rolling down my cheeks, watching the poor pig.

Nat notices my reaction, and she holds my hand and squeezes it.