blue eyes

Chapter 13

Zoe:
What's the point of living in a massive city if I can't get away from this one man?
"Zoe," Brandon relaxed his grip on her arms.
"What are you doing here?"
"I just went to Goodwill to get some more clothes for work," Brandon held up the bag. "Then I stopped for a donut. That hot sign is hard to resist."
"That's where I'm headed myself," Zoe replied, looking him up and down.
Neither of them said anything more for a moment. Zoe felt bad about how she reacted to his news on Friday, but didn't want to go into why she'd reacted the way she did. All she wanted was a donut.
"I'm sorry about Friday," Brandon finally broke the silence. "I don't like the way we left things. Is there something I can do to fix it?"
"It wasn't you," Zoe sighed again. "I'm sorry for the way I reacted to your news. I should've just been happy for you. And I am."
"I'm afraid I still don't believe you," Brandon replied. "If I buy you a donut, will you tell me why it upset you?"
"Resorting to bribery, eh?"
"Absolutely," Brandon said, gesturing back towards the front door of the donut shop. "Plus, I'd feel like an ass if I kept you out here against your will and made you miss out on the hot and fresh ones."
"I'll let you buy me a donut," Zoe conceded. "I may or may not talk."
"Sounds like a deal to me," he smiled, holding open the door for her.
"Hello," the girl behind the counter said as they walked up. "Oh, hello. You're back for more!"
Zoe bristled as the girl's tone and demeanor changed when she noticed that Brandon was with her. Was this jealousy? Over Brandon? Oh no.
"Yup, I'm back," Brandon laughed. "Zoe here needs a donut."
"Sure," the girl gave Zoe a glance, then returned her focus to Brandon. "What kind?"
Zoe was no stranger to feeling invisible, but this situation had her blood boiling. She had half a mind to just storm out.
"I don't know what she's feeling," Brandon said, taking a step closer to Zoe. "What looks good, babe?"
Zoe looked up and found Brandon smiling down at her. Her cheeks flushed a little. Once she regained her composure, she turned back to the scowling girl behind the counter and smiled sweetly.
"I'll take two of the freshest donuts you have," she said.
"We're out," the girl snarked back. "Unless you want a raw one."
"Oh Kelsey, you're full of it," a middle aged woman came over to the register, bumping Kelsey out of the way. "We have plenty of hot donuts for you, ma'am. Kelsey here just wants all of the pretty boys for herself."
The woman grabbed six hot donuts and put them in a box for Zoe. Brandon got his wallet out to pay, but the woman waved him away.
"They're on the house, sugar," the woman said. "Y'all have a great day."
"Are you sure?" Brandon looked flustered.
"Yup," the woman nodded. "You two look so cute together. Don't let Kelsey's attitude ruin your day."
Zoe blushed again and smiled in thanks. Brandon left a five dollar bill on the counter and turned to leave. Zoe walked behind him with her donuts. He held the door for her again.
Brandon walked towards an empty bench on the far end of the bus station. Zoe followed him blindly, embarrassed about how all of that had gone down.
"Sorry about that," Brandon said. "She was really flirty when I went in there the first time, but I didn't think she'd be rude to you. That was the first thing that popped in my mind."
"She was a piece of work," Zoe agreed. "I didn't take any of it personally."
She opened the box and took out a donut, then held out the box towards Brandon. He shrugged his shoulders, then took one.
They ate in silence for a moment. Zoe took another donut, then set the box on the bench in between them. She momentarily considered telling him everything, but quickly squashed that thought. People always treated her differently when they found out.
"So, about Friday," Brandon ventured.
"Yeah, that," Zoe replied. "Last week was a whirlwind. We signed a new author, one of my dear friends, and it's all been really overwhelming for them. They're completely new to this world and this process. It's been meeting after meeting and late nights editing and writing. I got home way after my bedtime Thursday night, then had to intercede in the middle of the night when my author was having a meltdown. I'm a girl who likes her sleep. I was a mess all day Friday and had a late meeting that night."
"I hear you," Brandon said slowly. "But I also get the feeling that that's not all there was to it."
Zoe took a deep breath, then decided to be a little more transparent.
"Okay," Zoe's voice wavered a little. "You know what, Brandon? You're right. You're absolutely right. I was super triggered on Friday and there is more to it. But I'm not ready to share it with you."
Zoe's voice cracked a little at the end of that speech. She turned away from Brandon and blinked her eyes a bunch, hoping the tears that were threatening would get sucked back up into her tear ducks. She reached in the box and grabbed another donut.
"Hey," Brandon said, gently placing a hand on Zoe's shoulder. "Thank you for telling me. I'm sorry that you were hurt in the past. I don't want to keep bringing that hurt up for you."
"It's okay," Zoe sighed. "I'm in therapy. I'm learning how to deal with it. I just wasn't as on my game because I hadn't slept. I usually have a better handle on my emotions."
"Relationships are a two way street," Brandon replied. "I don't want you to have to manage your emotions around me. Or have to deal with extra stress. Let me help."
"I don't know how to do that," Zoe said in a small voice.
"I'll show you how," Brandon smiled. "We'll get through it together."
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why do you want to help me?"
"Because you're my friend," Brandon put his hand on Zoe's hand. "And that's what friends do."
"It's really that simple?"
"It is. I promise."
Zoe liked the feeling of Brandon's hand on top of hers. It helped calm the anxiety swirling in her mind about having a real friend. Her only real friend was Gilbert. Even Sam was under contract now. Brandon felt different than everyone else, but would he stick around when he found out who she really was?
Zoe looked down and realized that at some point she must have turned her hand over because they were now holding hands for real. She stared at their fingers intertwined. It felt so natural, but also very foreign. Zoe had very little experience with men and none of it had been this gentle.
"What time is it?"
Brandon looked down and saw that his watch was peeking out from under his sleeve. Even from just the little bit she could see, Zoe could tell that that was probably a very expensive watch. Brandon let go of her hand and did that thing that men do when they dramatically shake their wrist to free their fancy watches from the binds of their clothing. The movement looked so natural.
"It's 11:02," he said.
"That's a nice watch," Zoe replied, not even registering the time.
"Thanks," Brandon said. "I got it at Goodwill just now. It's pretty busted up, but seems like it still works."
"Was it expensive?"
"I'm sure it was originally," Brandon tensed a little. "But it wasn't priced very high because of the crack and there's paint in the links of the band. Plus, all the clothes and accessories are marked down right now."
"I see," Zoe felt herself spiraling again, but she really wanted to trust Brandon. "It matches your new look."
Brandon looked up at her with hope in his eyes. Zoe did her best to meet his gaze with a real smile. His shoulders relaxed and he smiled down at his watch. She took a moment to admire his features while he was distracted. He really was an incredibly attractive man. He looked as much like himself in these clothes as he had when Zoe first met him. How could he play both parts so seamlessly? The same way I do, I guess.
Zoe averted her eyes before Brandon caught her looking. She watched a bus pull up across the street and discharge its passengers before going out of service. She thought back to the woman in the Krispy Kreme commenting on how good Zoe and Brandon looked together.
Before she even had time to think any further, a bus pulled up in front of them and parked. Zoe stared at their reflection in the window. They did look good together. Suddenly, she locked eyes with Brandon's reflection and realized he was going the same thing. She blushed and looked away.
"We do balance each other well," Brandon said.
"Something like that," Zoe muttered, not able to keep herself from smiling.
"On that note," Brandon cleared his throat a little. "I was wondering if you'd come with me to a wedding next Sunday. Not tomorrow, the one after that. My friend George from, well, we looked out for each other on the street, er, on a stoop, really."
Brandon was clearly nervous about this. Zoe could feel the tension. Without thoroughly thinking through this action, she reached out and grabbed his hand, squeezing it kindly. Brandon paused and looked at her.
"I would love to go," Zoe found herself saying. "Where is it? And when? You said Sunday?"
Brandon grinned wildly and Zoe began to panic. Why the heck did I just say yes? To being his wedding date? This whole friendship just took a wild turn. Brandon ran his hand through his hair. God, he has good hair. Crap! Keep yourself together, Fisher!
"That's great," Brandon exclaimed. "It's at 2pm at St. Mary's downtown. It'll be pretty casual, given, you know, the situation."
"I get it, yeah," Zoe bristled a little at his tone. "I've been to a homeless wedding before."
MAYDAY MAYDAY WHY DID YOU JUST SAY THAT OUT LOUD?! ABORT MISSION! WE'RE GOING DOWN.
"Oh cool," Brandon replied, not picking up on Zoe's internal distress. "Then yeah, that's it. I can meet you there. Or at your apartment and we can bus together."
"E-Either is fine," Zoe said a little too cheerfully. "I should probably get back home. I have a lot to prep for this week."
Zoe stood and straightened her coat. Brandon stood, too, looking a little worried.
"I actually have to get to work soon, too," he frowned. "But I'll see you on Friday?"
"Oh umm, yes," Zoe replied. "Crab sandwiches in the park. Right. Yup, I'll be there. Bye, Brandon,"
"Bye, Zoe," Brandon waved.
Zoe walked to the corner, then crossed in whatever direction the signal was on, not paying attention to where exactly she was going. ~I can't believe I told him I'd been to a homeless wedding. What was I thinking?! At least I didn't tell him that I was actually in the wedding. I'm so glad he didn't say anything about it. I hope he doesn't ask on Friday. Oh god, what have I gotten myself into?~
A few blocks later, Zoe realized she'd zigged too far west and had to zag back northeast a ways to get back to her building. Muscle memory got her through the lobby, onto the elevator, and to her floor, leaving her lost in thought. As she neared her office, she saw Sam's coat hanging on her rack. Zoe blinked a few times, then shook her head and rolled her shoulders, trying to get back into work mode. Once she felt ready, she cracked her knuckles and walked in.