poems of a 14 year old

~trans body~

I stare in the mirror
Wondering why I'm like this
I have a curvy women's body
But the mind of a teenage boy
No I don't mean Im a tomboy

I want to be a boy
I want a flat chest
I want a body of a man

It hurts to look at myself in the mirror
The pain I feel in my chest
I sit and I judge all the parts of my body that aren't supposed to be there

"Such a beautiful young lady you are"
Ouch, that stong
Maybe if I change my name and use he/him it will make me feel better about myself

Well that doesn't work
There's still an unbelievable pain in my chest
Im still not the boy I've always dreamt of being
I'm an imposter in a young women's body

I tape up my chest so tight I can't breath
Why am I like this?
Why most I be born in the wrong body?
I look at myself in the mirror and cry

My chest will never be flat enough
My hips will always to wide
My waist to narrow
My thighs to big
My face to feminine

It will never be the perfect body