18. CRIES

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I tried to calm but nothing work .

I cried harder and harder, 

Voices in my head  didn't stop , I am feeling weak again and I hate it

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Voices in my head  didn't stop , I am feeling weak again and I hate it. 

( if you are sensitive about self harming words you can skip till  💜 heart )

You are not enough

You deserve to die

I am shame on you

This happened all because of you

You are dumb

Everyone will leave you

You were worthless

You are sinner

You are monster

You were just toy to me

You really think that I loved you then your biggest fool in the world

All flashbacks started coming . It feels like it just happened yesterday.  I still can hear those faint screams and begging.

Leave her !!! ........ stop it please stop it

Aahhhhh it is hurting ................dad please stop 

Don't do that ..............he is innocent...............please stop *screams*

Don't leave me ........... I really love you

I trusted you ...........why did you do that to me *crying  sound*

I was breathing heavily,  my heart is aching . I want this to stop please . Then everything turned black.

I woke up on the floor of my room , then I remembered everything,  I checked time , it was 8 :00 pm.

I went to bathroom

I washed my face and took a shower and wore my pajamas

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I washed my face and took a shower and wore my pajamas.

I dropped message to mom that I am staying with my friend's house for sleepover .

I went to the living room and the maids were already there so I told them to give me coffee.

I went back to my room and sat on my desk and opened my work mobile to see many emails. Sigh

I messaged cha to send papers that I have to work on .

After a min I was having the 1st bunch of paper to sign and the 2nd bunch of files to read .

I siped my coffee while doing work .

It is 1 in morning so I quickly did my night routine and sleep.

In Morning

I did my routine and went to college like nothing happened again .

I did my routine and went to college like nothing happened again

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Saty safe and smiling 💜

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