Autocorrect

Chapter 4: Tell me a lie

Tell me I'm a screwed up mess,
that I'll never listen, listen.
Tell me you don't want my kiss,
that you need your distance , distance.Tell me anything but don't you say he's what you're missing, baby. If he's the reason that you're leaving me tonight,spare me what you think and tell me a lie.

It's the day after discovering Zach's passing and I'm in my room.  I didn't know what to do about Zach, but I didn't yell out, or scream or cry. I sat down there, beside him and worried. I worry a lot now, lately. But, ever since Zach died, everything has gotten a whole lot worse. The voices are back and now, more vicious than ever.
After finding Zach in music class, they blamed me for his death, going on and on, about how it was my fault. I actually began to blame myself too, I mean who wouldn't? Some crazy shit happened the day before and I guess that it was too much for him to handle, I tried to tell myself this but it just wouldn't sink in, everything was too coincidental for the situation. Until this morning.
Zach's parents had come over to my house, really early in the morning, or course I had seen them after his death, to give my condolences and everything, but, this morning was different, less sad, and more shocked, out of breath, almost.
They handed me a letter, and told me that they found it atop Zach's guitar in his room, they said that they weren't going to read it because it was addressed for me, but said that they couldn't help it, because it might've been the last things and words he was thinking before.

I'm just opening the letter now though. To see what it says, I couldn't bring myself to open the letter earlier, it was too nerve wracking. My hands are still shaking about thinking what I'm to find inside. Maybe I really was the cause of his death? What if he says that he didn't love me? He loved someone else? If he did surely it was, Alex he had always liked her. Maybe he was gay and couldn't find a way to come out without hurting someone?
I just want all these questions to be answered and the thoughts to stop.
I rip open the letter.

Boo,
I'm sorry that it had to end this way. I really didn't mean for any of this to happen.
I don't know what came over me in the end, it was all just so hard, and confusing and I didn't know where my head was. The last thing that I wanted to do was hurt you. I know that you're strong, I do, but I couldn't help seeing you as this fragile, delicate little flower that I always had to protect. So, I'm protecting you. Again, I never wanted to hurt you, but knowing that without me there, you'll be safe, I know that this was the right thing to do. Maybe, it wasn't the ideal situation of how we were to say goodbye, but it was the best choice, in my eyes. I love you, and always will. I hope that this doesn't change anything.

Love you always, Zachipoo.
Oh, and tell Vincent, thanks.