ＦＲＩＥＮＤ.

friend.

"Have you asked her out yet?" I asked him as I made myself comfortable on the bench he was seated at.

"Not exactly, but I have been texting her. Hopefully I can sneak in the question throughout out the convo." He said, scooting over for me to have enough space.

"What were you planning on doing?" I now asked fixing my eyes on him and him only.

"I was thinking on taking her to the garden downtown and having a picnic. I figured it'd be perfect since the sunset looks beautiful down by the lake- oh also maybe buying one of those cute picnic baskets and even getting her flowers...."

Hearing him talk about his date with her only made me realize how in love I was with him. As a friend, I only admired him for his dedication and admiration towards wanting this to come out perfect for both him and her. But as a girl, a girl who had fallen in love with him- it only broke my heart.

It broke my heart because it made me realize how I'd only ever be a friend, his friend. Nothing more and nothing less. He'd only ever see me as someone he could rely on for advice and trust to tell such things to.

Many times I wondered and dreamed what it would feel like being in the girls position, knowing someone liked me so much and took the time to make me feel so loved. How it'd feel getting ready for the perfect date with him and waiting to hear a knock at my door, only to see him standing their waiting for me. To hold his hand and share such beautiful moments with him that'd later on turn into memories we'd both cherish and hold onto forever.

To simply be loved by him and know he loves me as much as I love him.

"Y/N, are you even listening to me?" He asked me catching me off guard.

"Sorry," I apologized. "I think it's all perfect and will turn out perfect." I added giving him a smile which he reciprocated.

"Good, I just figured since you're my close friend and a girl, that it'd be best to hear your opinion." He said looking over at the open field in front of us. "I just want this to be perfect, I really like her and want her to feel special." He added with nothing but love and comfort in his voice.

Sometimes I wondered how many times I forced myself to hold back my emotions and even the want to cry. You'd think by now I'd be an expert at holding everything back and keeping it to myself, but no matter how many times I put myself in this situation...it always broke my heart as if it was the first time.

"Trust me Yoongi, she'll feel more than special." I felt the lump in my throat slowly start to form. Ignoring the feeling I straightened my posture before turning to look back at him. "She's beyond lucky to have met someone like you." Before he could turn to look at me I turned back to look at the field, forcing myself to stop my tears from falling.

"What about you?" He now asked, eyes still towards the open field. "What about me?" I questioned as I felt my body tense at the question.

"Anyone special in your life make a sudden appearance?"

If only he knew.

"Not really. I don't have the time to look into that stuff, especially not with how busy school is at the moment for me." I said pretending to sound so sure of myself.

"And to think I was the smart one out of all of us." He teased, a chuckle leaving his mouth.

That he was, another thing I admired about him. He always showed such passion for what he did, didn't matter if it was a math subject or his love for playing an instrument, he never gave up and did his best.

"Guess the roles have switched." I said chuckling along with him. "Plus you're always ahead of everyone else in every subject, so it's no surprise you have so much free time to yourself." I Added remembering how'd he always be ahead of everyone in his class and onto whatever was supposed to be taught in the next month.

"I guess it's just some hidden talent I have." He said shrugging his shoulders as if it was nothing. "But it sure is something I'm thankful for. Hopefully with all the free time I have I'll be able to dedicate some of my free time to this girl." He said as a smile slowly started to appear on his face due to the single thought of her.

"I'm sure you will."

After a few minutes of us talking a bit more, I had decided it'd be best for me to leave. As much as I enjoyed spending time with him, I still could only do so much to keep myself from hurting and feeling self pity.

"Well, I should probably start heading back. I have a test to study for so...I'll see you around?" I now said as I got up from the bench we were both seated at.

"Yeah, I'll keep you updated on my date. Also good luck on your test, I'm sure you'll do great." I simply nodded at him and turned around heading towards the dirt path.

Making my way back to the main entrance of the park I turned around hearing Yoongi's voice once again. Not thinking too much about it, I turned around only to see him talking to a girl. I wasn't too familiar with her, but from the looks of it they were close. He seemed to tell her something that made her laugh and teasingly slap him on the shoulder. As they proceeded to talk I noticed him start to tense and even show some signs of being nervous, sooner or later the girl only nodded to whatever he said. You could tell she was beyond excited but contained herself from wanting to burst out of pure joy.

It all made sense and soon after I felt the sudden cold stab at my heart and for the second time today it broke, the feeling overtaking my entire body.

That's when I knew that was her. The girl he so loved and showed such admiration for, the one he wanted to make everything perfect for and the one he wanted for himself.

As they both leaned into one another, I felt the tears I had held back thousands of times fall down my face. As a friend, I was happy for him and only wished the best for him. And as the girl who had fallen in love with him, I felt my heart break into millions of pieces that I knew would take time to recover.

But at the end- I was only ever his friend.