⚠️⚠️Tw teen abuse
It's cold.
That's my first thought as I wake up to the obnoxious beeping of my alarm, why does it have to be cold.
The icy air hits my legs as they dangle off the side of the bed, instantly making the unshaven hairs stand up causing a shiver up my spine. The smell of food wafting through the air indicates that mom was sober enough to get up in this morning.
Groaning as I stretch your already tired bones, I get up and get ready for today. Even though I don't have much choice in clothing since it's uniform but the variety of different eyeliner colors is the only spark in my life. Sitting on the floor doing my makeup I decide on yellow today, because why not?
Sighing at the thought of interacting with my mother, I reluctantly walk into the dining room which in reality is just a kitchenette with a table and two chairs. I'm greeted to the sound of gagging down the hall in the bathroom while the once pleasant smell of bacon cooking is now burnt smoke. Realizing that mom is indeed not sober and probably pulled an all nighter then decided to make breakfast last minute just to leave a mess fills me with dread.
My stomach now angry that it's not getting the once promising meal.
Cleaning the brunt pan and eating the remaining edible pieces of bacon I rush to brush my teeth in the kitchen sink, hoping to not encounter the bottomless pit that birthed me; but not all good things come to those who wait.
"You look like a whore with that"
Choking on the foaming toothpaste, I spit it out forcing a smile.
"Good morning to you too mom" A noticeable irritation in my tone.
"Don't get smart with me, don't you have school"
She sounds to.... Normal..
"Im leaving I was just brushing my teeth" Turning to the hallway I get a big pain as the side of my face is greeted with none other than her hand.
"You fucking pig, you ate all my food. Who said it was for you"
Screaming in my face while I'm on the floor of the kitchen holding the now red cheek, I refuse to look up or say anything; from experience I know it's best to wait till she's done.
She crouches down to my level and starts plays with my hair and then violently grabs my jaw.
"Fucking ugly b*tch. The reason your father left is because he said you were just to ugly to be his..." a frown forms on her face
"you embarrass me."
With a final huff of air she gets up and stumbles to her room, finally leaving me to cry.
I run into my room rushing to fix the red mark along with the eyeliner and mascara that's running down my face; shaking, breathing heavy and fast, I look in the mirror trying to fix my makeup but I can only hear her voice in my head.
After realizing what the time was I compose myself and do the rest of the makeup quick and rush out the house. Of course she had to ruin the first day of senior year, tormenting me is her job basically. I put my earbuds in, the calming melodies take me to a far away place where nothing bad happens and the skies are always blue, but just as the blissful daydream starts, it is ended just as fast by the sight of students from school.
Unfamiliar and familiar faces fill the buss and a very pervy old man is definitely trying to see up your skirt. Knowing that the skirt is long enough, it doesn't bother you but the fact he's trying still does. With what feels like everyone's eyes on you and the pervert in front of you and the events that had just occurred, I begin to feel tears forming and the very familiar burn in the back of my throat, but before the first tear can fall the wondrous ding of the bus stopping brings me back to reality.
Rushing off the bus in a flash I feel a burst of air fill your lungs. Now the next task.
Walking through the gates, the only word you can use you describe school is a nightmare. Only bad memories fill your mind and the panic sets in. The thought of being harassed by other students again makes you nervous and the glances don't help. The hour is approaching so you take the first step expecting to go up into flames, but sadly that doesn't happen, just the next step.
Step after step, all I see is my own feet, I don't even bother looking up.
As you approach the door to your class, you peak through the window to see who's in your class. Your stomach drops to the floor; you see her, she made your life hell, and yet you see her laughing as if everything is fine, when the scars tell a different story. But as you watch in the corner of your eye you see someone coming....
"Shit" a whisper yell escapes my lips. It's the teacher.
Quickly opening the door only to have all eyes go on me, including hers, I make way to a empty seat in the back, not to late after me the teacher walks in and all students stand only to be told to sit again.
Hours
Upon
Hours
You didn't hear a thing the teacher said, it's the same repetitive sentences.
"Welcome back students"
"How was summer?"
"You guys have your materials"
It's your senior year. You already know the get down.
And then finally it's lunch. I have no food nor money and the food here sucks. So water it is. Walking to the hot water dispenser, I hear an all too familiar laugh, Joy. Ironic isn't it, she is literally named Joy but bring absolute sadness.
"Oh my god guys look!!" The sound of squealing and rushed footsteps get close while I'm internally runny away.
"It's Y/N... you look... different. I almost didn't recognize you.. lost weight?" The condescending tone of Joys smooth voice echos in the halls.
"You know she used to be like twice that size" a giggle escapes her smile "but now look, so small. Guess you finally took my advice"
"Nice to see you Joy. Excuse me I need some water."
"Don't talk to me like that you—" Joy gets interrupted by a grab to her waist, pulled into a unnecessarily long kiss by a unfamiliar face.
"Oh Kookie baby you found me. I was just talking to my old friend Y/N"
He swiftly tilts his head at me, almost examining me from head to toe.
"Hi I'm new here. Names Jungkook"
Arrogant. He's definitely arrogant. If he's with Joy he's probably no different from her.
"Hi, can uh can you please excuse me I need water."
And with that I get my water and leave.
During class I could feel Joys eyes burning wholes into me. Can't she just leave me alone.
The bus ride home was uneventful just sad business men and women along with the rowdy groups of kids.
A notification from my phone wakes me from my small bus nap.
*Your still fat*-Unknown
I was to shocked to react. I just turned my phone off. Looking out the window I just let it all out. This morning, the bus, school; tears steaming down my face before I know it, dripping onto my hands.
I can see my stop approaching, as I get off, a face catches my attention. It was Jungkook, he has the same stop as me? Weird. Anyways the walk home was horrible, it was cold and windy and I have no jacket except my uniform sleeves, but the walk isn't long.
Quietly you enter the house. The tv is on in her room, she's passed out on the bed. Good.
I hop in the shower, I feel dirty from everything today, everyone's words echoing through my head as the warm steam fills the small room. Tears shed and I decided to do the unspeakable, I grab my razor and hold it up to my arms
"Im worthless, a pig who needs to be in pai-"
"You're not the only person who lives here, I have to pee!!"
The moment of weakness is broken by the she-devil her self. Turning the water off and wrapping myself in a towel.
Running to my room. I examine my cheek and find a bruise, great.
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