Is this what love feels like???

"A rose for you my love, to remember me."

I stood with my soul blank, watching over my mother. She looked so dull. I'd always known my mother as a hero. Specifically, my hero. She had always been so...free spirited. Always ready to face anything that came her way. I suppose that mother I'd always known had disapeared. She was so sick and lifeless. Its as if she knows she isnt going to survive. A felt a warm tear roll down my cheek to my neck. I had never thought about my mother dying before. She is the only one who understands me. Father loves me, but he and I will never have as strong a bond as I do with her. I needed her. She couldn't leave me. Not now. I felt her eyes on me. Her weak doe eyes were staring at me with a frown plastered across her face.

"Mi amor, come here."

I took a few steps forward towards her before sitting down on the hospital bed next to her.

"Listen to me love. You are so strong and powerful. You are going to do great things in life, and you wont need me to support you. I love you so much, and I beileve in you. You are so much like me and you will never loose that when I'm gone."

 I really did apprieciate what she said. But her words echoed in my brain. "When I'm gone." Suddenly my eyes were wet. I couldn't stop it. I needed my mother. She was wrong. I do need her. Her frown deepened as she looked into my tear-filled eyes. She took my hand in hers.

"Don't cry my love. It is all going to be okay. I will always be here in your heart. I know I'm sick and I'm not going to get better. I'm dying sweetheart. But, you need to know that I love you. Everything that is meant to be will be. Just always follow your heart."

Then she turned over to her side table and grabbed a rose out of her vase. 

"A rose for you my love, to remember me."

She handed me the rose and kissed me on the forehead. 

"I love you Rosabelle. I love you so much more then you know. I love your father too. Make sure you both always remember that."

My head was spinning and I was uncontrolably crying. My mother couldnt leave us. How selfish was she?! I need her and I cannot live without her here. 

Suddenly I looked over to see her eyes slowly closing. No. No. 

Then, her heart rate monitor started beeping crazily, and... her heart had stopped. 

I grabbed her hand and sobbed, but the nurses and doctors came rushing over to try and save her. 

I couldnt breathe. I couldnt think. I couldnt live without her. How. Why out of all people did the person I need the most have to leave me. I started to choke. My face was soaked with tears. Just then I looked at my dad, standing there, his eyes lifeless as he watched upon my mother. He knew she was gone. So did I. We both just werent sure we could handle it yet. I got up and hugged him tightly, sobbing and shaking. I needed her. We both did. But she was gone. Forever. I could never see her again, hug her again, or talk to her again. God, I dont even think I can ever love anyone like her again. She was my glue, and now I am just pile of broken pieces without her.